This is my first job, and I am so tired. Is the below normal? What am I to do? What would a great manager do?
My manager once said to me that I deserve to feel safe at work and helped me when I was dealing with harassment from a notoriously unprofessional and well loved colleague. I was so grateful. Now, at my last 1:1 with her, I told her that I was depleted (long story) and asked for help, but she only asked me to tell her how she could help me without sharing even what I'm allowed to ask for. At the end of our 1:1, she mentioned socializing with my former abusive manager. Today I had to tell her, after my project lead was angry with me, wouldn't share why, and told me to speak to my manager or our leadership about it, about how my project lead was treating me, my confusion, and asked for help. She simply thanked me for being professional and told me that I could come see her whenever I need or want. I think my project lead was reprimanded by our leadership, but my project lead got upset again, says whatever she wants as loudly as she wants regardless of the context, and even our leaders walk on eggshells around her. At the end of the day, I heard my manager and a close colleague speaking in Mandarin about my project lead and I, laughing about the situation, and then suddenly go quiet when they remembered I could hear and understand what they were saying.