Hi all, first time posting here... I am living with a family member who is struggling more and more with chronic pain, and the ways in which it is impacting their ability to work, socialise, vacation, enjoy their hobbies, etc. They have been getting more depressed lately as a result of missing out on so much, and it breaks my heart to see it.
I want to be as supportive as possible, and I want them to get out more, see their friends, enjoy life as best they can, but when I suggest things like mobility aids, therapy, meditation, all of the non-medical aids that help people with chronic pain, they give me a bunch of excuses that sound to me like internalised ableism.
They'll say stuff like "I don't want to be reliant [on a stick/ frame/ wheelchair]" or "I don't need therapy, I always just bottle it up" (I wasn't talking about therapy with feelings and stuff, more like coaching on how to manage their pain from a psychological perspective). They use derogatory language about themselves in a cruel way, and when I ask them not to, they tell me that's not my place as someone who's not disabled.
I don't think it'd be helpful to directly call them out on this, and regardless I'm a very conflict-averse person by nature. Is there any other way I can encourage them to try these things in a way that isn't naggy or preachy, or wouldn't sound condescending coming from someone who isn't disabled? What would work for you if you were a stubborn image-conscious teenager?