I (F28) live in supported accommodation in a dispersed property provided to me by a housing association. This housing organisation also provide care and support for people with an array of disabilities & other needs. They provide me with support staff as part of a social care commission in partnership with adult social services.
I am 2:1, as I am autistic, have quite significant mental health needs and physical health issues - but I do not require personal care, I am capable of doing that myself. The support staff come to my home to support with cleaning and maintaining my home, and support me in the local community after years of agoraphobia (the latter we haven't got to yet). I have always had female-only staff, and was promised this in my assessment before I'd even moved into the property.
They claim there is no official record of this, despite everyone knowing that when any men need to come to my property (i.e. maintenance, gas safety, etc) there must be female staff present as I cannot be alone with men. Without revealing too much information, I am afraid of men and do not feel safe around men as a result of significant trauma.
They are now trying to put male staff on my team due to staff shortages, but I have refused this because I am not in a place to be able to do that right now. I haven't even started trauma therapy yet at this point, which means I have no proper outlet for the discomfort and distress this causes me. I have refused to take any support this week where they'd placed men on my rota, which had been agreed before I had even been made aware of it.
As you can imagine, I'm extremely anxious and upset about this. They have spoke to me in the past about potentially introducing men into the picture as to provide me with healthy examples of men, which I acknowledge, but they didn't even ask me and they know that I have no outlet for working through that trauma, and I don't feel comfortable having male on my team because of that, but also because I would honestly rather not have men on my team altogether. It brings me significant distress, and my home is my only safe space that hasn't been infiltrated by abuse.
Can I legally refuse male support staff? I have done a bit of research online but can only find guidance pertaining to intimate and personal care, not in terms of support staff coming to my home and supporting me in the community. They're still adamant I must do this at some point, but the pushing is what is bothering me. If I had legal grounds, I'd flat out refuse. Any help or discussion is appreciated, thanks.