Was it unprofessional of my child’s theatre group director to dismiss my concerns about an older student?
My 7 year old daughter attends a theatre group every Tuesday for children and teens aged 5–19. There’s an 18 year old student there who has always been friendly to my daughter, and I’d never had an issue before.
The Saturday before last was my daughter’s birthday, and we took her for a meal at a restaurant/bar. Half is a family/restaurant side and half is a more mature drinking bar area While walking past the bar area to go to the bathroom, I noticed a very drunk girl kissing her boyfriend and slurring her words. My daughter went over and said hello and I then realised it was the older student from my daughter drama group. I wanted to get the conversation over and done with and said “hey great to see you. It’s her birthday today that’s why we are here for her birthday meal”
She said hello to my daughter back, wished her happy birthday, my daughter asked what she’s drinking and the girl said “Summer on the beach” substituting the real cocktail name. My daughter said she wants to try one. And she the girl said that it’s just orange juice a pineapple juice so boring but offered to buy her a “Cherry Bakewell” Mocktail since it’s her birthday because that’s what she thinks it’s the best mocktail. It was a nice offer but she was visibly intoxicated and nearly fell going to the bar to order it for my daughter. After that we managed to get back to the table but later I also saw her vaping outside.
My daughter thanked her for the drink, but I felt uncomfortable the whole time. The student was clearly drunk, vaping, and behaving inappropriately in public while interacting with my child.
Last Tuseday, after dropping my daughter off, I spoke privately with the drama group director. I explained what happened and said I was concerned about the example this older student was setting.
He reacted sarcastically at first over dramatically gasping, then when I didn’t change my expression said she is 18 and legally allowed to drink and vape. He also said he didn’t care what students did outside drama unless it harmed children or affected the group. I said I don’t want my daughter to think it’s ok to grow up like that and vape or drink irresponsibly, he dismissed me again saying “Well done that’s good parenting to teach that to your child.” Then walked away.
I felt brushed off and disrespected. Was I overreacting, or was it unprofessional of the director to completely disregard my concerns?