u/Fuzzy-Tangerine-147

I got sudden anxiety / health anxiety & ocd at age like 19. I started to feel sudden anxiety surges and panic. It kept me from driving , going to classes, etc I was so scared. I decided to go on lexapro 5mg, it helped for a bit and then I dipped in depressive feelings for a bit, then I felt better. Finally I felt good and never panicky so I thought I could take it every few days. I started takiing 5mg of Lexapro every few days. I was fine doing that from like October- March. Then I would do every other day. Covid summer (2020) I felt slightly depressive, told my doctor and she said take it everyday! I started taking it everyday again and felt better again with here and there bad days. by the next summer I still had low feelings, tried to push thru and some days were great some super low. By summer 2022 I spiraled for no reason into depression what felt like. So I went to 10mg. 2023& 2024 we’re good. Until end of 2024 I started feeling wishy washy again w lows I also felt a lot of fatigue and laziness I felt disconnected. By July 2025 I decided to lower to 7.5mg. It didn’t make a huge difference at all, I could cry again more and stuff though. And to present day I’m still on 7.5 now I’m almost 28 y old! In February I added 150mg XL to help combat the “low feelings”. And I do feel better but still not great. I truly want to completely eliminate LEXAPRO and just see who I am off of it. I went on it for panic not this disassociating depressive feelings that I now am trying to take care of. The Wellbutrin addition was supposed to be groundbreaking- it definitely helped me not to go LOW LOW but my baseline is still blah / discontentment in a way? It’s like I’m stuck in this state and I truly wonder if it’s the ssri effect LEXAPRO has on me. Has ANYONE gone off after years and felt better ?