I am 29(m) and I have been at this job for the last 5 years. I work in liquor retail in a side department of a much larger grocery store as a position between clerk and manager (I am responsible for ordering product but not in charge of the paperwork), and slowly over the last year the place has been run to hell and back. I am required to basically put away liquor trucks away by myself, and I have no help so if I have a customer then I have to drop what I am doing and check them out.
I used to be able to handle this, but slowly burnout has taken root, and the skeleton crew (skeleton is putting it generously) fiasco has been draining me. Often times during the morning when I open I end up spending half of my shift picking up after the night crew (some of the night employees are good, others would convulse violently if you took away their phones and I have brought it up to my higher ups numerous times but our side department gets overlooked and nobody ever bothers to intervene) and they are barely given any time to do the night chores besides the most important steps since our department has become way busier than it used to.
I have started to become miserable lately. My mental health has been slipping, often times I would laugh or cry out of control when I am alone in the store. The stress has been mounting, and every time I attempt to bring up a meeting with our store manager they would brush it aside and go back to being stuck in their meetings. This coupled with some store specific problems that continue to be ignored has really dragged things down for me. I did apply for a different position in the store, something a lot lower stress that I can focus on without ping-ponging around violently between the register and the task that needed to be done 3 days prior.
I think the most awakening part that is telling me to get out was last thursday, I was working as usual when I suddenly started to feel faint, and for a brief moment I thought about laying down on the floor and passing out, I was that out of it, and a coworker from another department saw how crap I looked, pale and eyes half closed, and sent me on break to recover. The rest of that shift wasn't that bad but I fear if this will become a new normal. Breaks are a myth at my department because there needs to be bodies to cover breaks, something that is barely able to be done in other departments and since my department is probably below the mold in the kitchen we get overlooked, moreso me since I got tired of asking for a break unless I am feeling out of it.
All the signs are pointing me to the obvious solution of quitting. But sadly I need the job and I just cannot find another job in my area. I live in a rural part of the midwest, and jobs are not plentiful. Indeed just shows remote jobs (which I highly suspect are scams and if they don't list a town name I ignore them) or medical jobs. I have thought about commuting to a larger city, but it would be an hour-hour and a half commute and with how high gas prices are getting I wouldn't be able to afford the commute, and I sadly don't have the money to relocate. oh the joy of the midwest.
I just feel so stuck, and I just wish to see a way out but with the direction the economy is going I am probably going to be stuck at my Sisyphean torture until I get fired for having a mental breakdown on the wrong person or being sent to the hospital.