My daughter who I haven’t talked to or seen in 8 years passed away two weeks ago in a car accident.
I never stopped loving her for a single minute but I never approached her to show her that her boundaries matter and was willing to wait for her to come back on her own even if it took decades.
Two days ago I returned to work because I’m a lawyer and I just couldn’t take time off like that and was already late and had so much work to do, but earlier today my ex came to firm and gave me a folder filled with unsent letters that my daughter wrote to me and said she found them in her room and wanted me to have them.
And I waited to get home to read them because I knew I’d sob if I read them there and wouldn’t be able to work, and I’ve been sobbing nonstop for four hours now, I myself used to write her a lot of letters and messages that I’d just throw away.
She wrote about how embarrassed she was when she requested to not see me again and how she still loves me and how she wants to reunite with me and go on a trip and how she wants to meet my new wife and kids and she was wondering if I still love her and think about her like she does and she wrote about wanting to become a lawyer like me and that she was studying law and was wondering if I would be proud of her, she even wrote one after her ex boyfriend cheated on her and how she wished I was there and she was clearly crying because there was stains on the letter and that just broke my heart in a way that I didn’t know was possible.
I wish I’d get just 10 extra minutes with her to tell her I love her so much and that I couldn’t be any prouder in her.