u/Fuckingnoodles

Saw someone’s dog eating their chipotle they left unattended in the car.

The dog looked up at me like “don’t you dare narc on me bro, I’m having the best day of my life”

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u/Fuckingnoodles — 6 hours ago
▲ 2 r/ibs

Alright, I’ve got a pirate ship called the USS Pirate Friends With IBS

Our flag is a pair of soiled long john’s. It’s a gas powered ship, obviously.

Whats your pirate name? And how will you help this crew prosper on the seven seas?

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u/Fuckingnoodles — 2 days ago