u/Free-Indication-2804

I’m loving all of TGD, but 23 hits deep. As a child of an addict who has chosen to keep my father in my life, this line brought tears to my eyes. I chose to maintain a relationship with my father, but I carry very heavy burdens with that choice everyday.

If I chose to cut contact with him, he could’ve been anyone I want - anyone I want in my head and memory. He could’ve been a healthy parent, present all the time. Even clean. But he’s not clean, and I have had to watch him on his destructive path for much of my life. That’s a choice I decided to make for myself if it meant having a father. And because of that, I can’t idealize him. Instead, I’ve learned to accept him for who he is, and love him for the good and the bad.