(M19) Apologies if hard to understand, I broke it up so I can read it.
I while back I had a brief interruption in my lexapro and came off of it for a month, I'm back on it but it's made me realize that it dumbed me down to an extreme degree.
Prior to taking lexapro I had a complex and diverse vocabulary, I could spell anything, perfect English, grammar, amazing memory, good grades, it didnt take me 15 seconds to formulate a response to someone etc...
I'm genuinely dumb now, I noticed the spelling prior to my interruption and chalked it up to having not taken an English class for a minute, but my mind is nothing but fog.
I finally realized that it feels like walking through sludge to think when before it just felt like walking. I can't retain any info for more than five seconds.
Even now I forgot what I was going to say. I feel like a shell of myself, devoid of any real personality, hobbies or interests. I can't formulate an opinion, I depend on AI or friends to be a person with beliefs and opinions instead of a thing that just exists.
I want to quit but it's helped me, im sure everyone here can relate. For the first time in my life im not anxious or depressed, Im self assured and happy. I didnt even know I was anxious or depressed until I started taking it and felt how much it helped.
I need advice, is this normal/expected with anti depressants/anxiety, should I switch, if so what's the best alternative.
TLDR: Brain dumb, cant think, need advice or alternative.