u/Fading_Dawnbreaker

Was on my way home and brainstorming ideas for my book, when a thought popped into my head for another book I was planning. I just wanted to know if this joke lands or if I'm just getting too old?

His body glowing faintly, Calex flitted closer to Teddy's shoulder. The soft buzzing of his insect like wings, brushing Teddy's ear.

Suddenly, he darted off and yelled, his lyrical voice echoing around the dungeon. "Hey! Listen! It's this way!"

Teddy's head snapped around to stare at Calex. His eyes shrinking to pin pricks. Gritting his teeth, his blood boiling, Teddy summoned up all the willpower he could muster to control the violent urge to grab the little pixie and smash him into the dungeon wall.

Then just like that, it was gone. Teddy shook his head. "Where did that come from?"

Alright, that's the whole thing. Let me know if you get it.

So I thought I would share something funny that happened to me at work. I've been asking fellow employees if they would like to read my book I'm working on and handing out the link to RR. Anyways, I got back from my route today, and one of the dispatchers began chewing my ass out because I killed god in my story.

I was like, what?! I did no such thing. She proceeds to pull up the chapter where I discuss the nature of gods and how they function in my cosmology, points to the line where I say all the gods on Earth are dead. I actually, in person laughed in this older ladies face. I couldn't hold it in. It was just so damn funny.

I tried explaining it to her that it is fiction in a fiction story and I in no way intended that to be taken as my opinon on god. I told her if she doesn't like the story cosmology that's fine, but if it bothers her, she may not want to read fiction if she can't tell the difference between RL and make believe.

Anyways, just thought I'd share. I'm pretty sure she hates me now.

EDIT: Thought I'd drop the line from the book for context.

Michael froze. “…were?”

“Yes. There are no gods left on Earth.”

So when I first published chapters on rr. I only posted 4. Then I started posting 2 each week on Monday and Friday. I did post chapter 6 and 7 together because I felt letting the emotion cool on chapter 6 from Friday to Monday, would suck. So here it is, Monday and chapter 8 comes out. Should I just bite the bullet and put 9 and 10 out? I'm writing a slow burn isekai and I'm afraid that I didn't fish deep enough to get the bigger bites.

EDIT: Thank you all for the advice. I went ahead and scheduled 9 and 10 to drop today as well. I've got plenty of backlog to hold to my schedule.

Hi all. I've been doing some notes and writing up little anecdotes for one of my characters to share with her party members. I just wanted to know if this banter lands well. Does it sound organic in the back and forth? I'd love to tell you the anecdote, but it's actually part of the story and would give stuff away.

“Okay, so what did the slime call you?” Michael asked.

Avalon paused. For the first time in several minutes, she actually sounded uncertain. “I… do not know.”

Michael blinked. “You don’t know?”

“It lacked structured speech,” Avalon said defensively.

“I think you're just trying to avoid the question.”

Avalon frowned faintly, thinking back across centuries. “Burrblyplop… perhaps?”

Silence.

Michael's mouth twitched, a laugh he barely managed to choke down, and he cleared his throat. “That sounded made up.”

“It communicated entirely through wet noises, Michael. I did my best.”

EDIT: Okay I edited it a bit after I saw some problems. I also fixed the spacing so it reads a lot smoother. Thank you everyone, I'm really glad you like how well this banter came together and the feedback has been great.

I'm feeling starved for feedback on the chapters I've posted so far. It's hard to see my reader numbers and no comments or ratings. I've asked people I know to read my work, but all I get is it's good or something similar. How do other people deal with this crappy feeling? I know my story being off-meta wasn't going to get the highest veiwership, nor do I really care about RS. I just want my writing to be out there.

I get so excited each time I post a new chapter and get sucked into the numbers go brrr...mindset, but then I crash when I don't see any comments or feedback. I was aware that marking my story ai-assisted wasn't going to be the most popular choice, but it felt dishonest not to. I use ai to help me edit my work. I don't copy/paste anything. I just use it to check my grammar, spelling, punctuation, and point out redundant words/sentences. I look at what it shows me is wrong and I go back and re-read it and change it if it feels right. I felt that warrented an ai-assist tag, but I feel like it's also part of the problem.

I'd love to have actually people to bounce my story off and get their feedback on whats working and whats not. Is there a good place to do this?

Sorry for the edit. I originally posted this on my phone and I absolutely hate typing on it.