Friendships
Don’t really know who else to talk to or ask….So I know I’m being weird but I can’t help the way I feel. So I have a group of girl friends who I considered my closest girlfriends, there is 4 of us overall and have known each other for over 25+ years, I moved away around 10yrs ago but it never affected our friendship and I always make the effort to make plans etc whenever I go back. I really had the image of us all getting old together and still have the tight bond we have. I’m the type that friends are really important to me and I was always really proud of the friends I have whether male or female. Recently the girl group has been getting bigger as wives from our male friends have been joining and we now have a chat with around 10girls in it, bare in mind they all live in the city where I moved away from. I’ve been starting to feel more left out and more of an outsider as everyone else has been bonding more and doing more gatherings that I’m not/cant be a part of. It makes me feel sad as I feel im not as secure as I use to be with my original group of girls. It’s harder to have more in depth conversations as there is more of the girls whenever I do get to go back to the city. It feels like I can’t just ask my original group out to dinner without having to feel like I need to invite the others too and if I was to do it and the others find out then I’m coming across as the bitch.
Feels so silly cos at my age (40+) I didn’t think this would be something I would be dealing with. Should I just suck it up and swallow how I feel and have it eat me up inside and get all emotional about it with no release? Even with my original group of girls I’m finding it harder to open up to to express how I really feel and worry that they think I’m jus being petty and because I’m the one living far away there’s nothing I can do about it.
Sorry for long post but I don’t have many people to turn to and I feel like I need to get this off my chest.