Fomo velcro baby impossible to sleep train
I don't know what to do anymore. I have tried so many methods to see if one works (extinction, ferber, chair). They all end with my 12mo crying max 30-40min and then puking from being so upset (so then i end it all and change her sleep sack and hold her, where she passes out almost immediately from exhaustion). Doesn't matter how tired she is before putting her to bed, she needs to be held to fall asleep. Car and stroller naps excluded.
She is the type of baby who is very sensitive, and it doesn't help that her separation anxiety is strong.But she has had it in varying degrees for months now.
She never felt comfort from my presence. In the sense that i can be next to her, but if she is upset i need to HOLD HER. Nothing else works for her.
She was never able to fall asleep next to us. Since she was a baby we had to hold her, and then we would transfer her. I have tried so many times to have her fall asleep next to us. Even when i used to nurse her to sleep i rarely managed to get her to fall asleep next to me (and not on me).
I don't mind helping her fall alseep at night, but naps are becoming heavy and exhausting. She also starts daycare soon which worries me. After a cycle of 30-45min she wakes up crying and the only way to get her to keep napping is to go back in and hold her another 45-90min. At night she does stretches of 2 to 7 hours, depending on if she is teething etc. The middle of the night is the only time i will nurse her to sleep now (she doesnt fall asleep fully i still need to rock her), but i am working on cutting those feeds.
What does one do with these type of babies? Do they ever grow out of it and eventually accept to fall asleep with less assistance? She isn't walking yet and is still in a crib. If she still needs me to help her sleep then i will be there for her, but then every once in a while i am at my wits end and feel i can't keep doing this. And i feel if she learned to be comfortable falling asleep on her own she would get such better rest and be less cranky overall (she is a fairly fussy baby) . So then i try to sleep train, but it always ends up with her extremely upset and full of puke.