Dating a single mom of four for a little over 2years and 6 months. We are in are 30s and known each other for years prior. We get along great and have quite a bit of shared interest but financially it’s not stable long term. It’s starting to effect my goals a bit because while it’s not expect for me to help I step in from time to time. She has a brother who lives with her in the attic to help with the mortgage and bills. Sadly our living situation is off. I can’t move in due to our pets. She has complained about the lack of times im over her place so now I spend 5 days to 6 days of the week there and the rest at my place. I also help my mom who’s older from time to time and I feel emotionally and financially thin in a sense of growing towards my goals. I make decent money but nothing rich by any standards
I feel torn because it’s not due to her lack of effort and the kids are awesome and even though they’re not mine I don’t want to break their hearts but overall for her to be stable I feel she needs a third source of income which she had for a second with an ex/baby dad who’s not in the picture, a few months before she casually started dating me.
I can step in and make life easier massively but it would come at the expense of me and I’d have to give up on my goals. I got into this relationship thinking she was more stable( to a certain degree she is) but any major incident would make her crumble due to her situation.
Am I wrong for wanting to call it quits?
How do I deal with a breakup with kids ?
Is there any reality I could possibly make this work?