NEED URGENT ADVICE ⚠️
Alright. my group consists of around 10 people. were all girls. two of the girls in my group are having a huge fight both Of them are almost my best friends. the fight has basically been launched again today. Girl 1 we will name them Frank and Girl 2 we will call Sam. ok so Frank has a few good friends and Sam has a few but none that she shares her problems and vents to like she does to me. Frank and Sam have had problems with eachother since August last year, when Sam was going thru private issues and Frank wanted to help by Telling an adult and Sam got Very very upset by that, bc then she (Sam) was forced to see a therapist and her life got a bit more complicated as teachers were involved. Due to this, Sam was swearing a whole lot at Frank, and crying and trying to turn the rest of the group against her. it took a lot of convincing from me to convince Sam that Frank was trying to help and do the right thing, meanwhile I was trying to convince frank who was very upset that she had done the right thing by telling an adult bc school aged kids shouldnt have to deal with problems as big as these. When I view this issue, I feel as though Frank did the right thing as Sams Issue brought up past things with Frank and Franks mental health is just as important As Sam’s. however, I feel bad that now Sam’s life has been exposed to teachers and therapists when that’s not what she wanted. To make matters worse, Frank and Sam both had boyfriends in the same friend group and they were having a fight too bc Sam’s bf was bullying Franks bf and saying a bunch of crappp about Frank and other people in my group, saying that some of us should kill ourselves and that we were ugly and blah blah blah Frank became more mad at Sam when Sams bf was saying the crap, Sam didn’t defend some of the group members and even agreed with him (I think that’s bc she was still mad at Frank). Anyway, so fast forward to this year, Sam had a made A few lies here and there about Frank and another girl in our group and they secretly not so secretly didn’t really like Sam. also, Sam‘s boyfriend cheated on Sam with Sam‘s best friend and Sam was very very upset about it and I had to comfort her through that and it really made her mental health even worse. Anyway, Sam’s birthday was about to happen and Sam invited me, and another 2 girls from our geoup and some other friends from our grade that aren’t in our group. Sam told the rest of the group that she wasn’t having a bday party. The group founf out easy peasy that she was and that was it, they were sick of the lying and her being mean and they wanted to call her out the next day so the next day came and they had whole speech prepared with constructive feedback on how she should stop lying and be honest with the group and blah blah blah blah Sam being Sam didn’t really listen to any of the construction feedback and got really upset by it and called it overwhelming and unfair during the speech. Frank and the other girl admitted they were sorry and everything for anything they had done and Frank especially said sorry for telling her therapist about the issue last year even though Frank had already apologised to Sam multiple multiple multiple times, Sam said she would try take on the feedback and that she doesn’t blame Frank for anything, we all thought okay this is resolved by the way the group was not mad that she had. An invited them to the party. They were just mad that she had lied about it. anyway, so the past few weeks Frank has been planning her own birthday party and didn’t want to invite Sam but wanted to invite the rest of the group. We had all kept the secret very well and somehow Sam found out about it today and Frank’s birthday is in a few days, Sam came up to me today and asked if Frank was having a birthday and I said I don’t know. You’ll have to speak to Frank. Sam is obviously upset because she’s not sure what she has done to not be invited to the party and to anger the rest of the group and she was visibly upset. Sam makes it very obvious that she struggles with her mental health and so I go out of my way to comfort her and then sometimes she just instantly is fine even though I thought that she was struggling like less than a day and I really worry about her a lot. Frank and I both made the decision to delete social media because it was messing up our mental health too much however Sam who has a very bad addiction to social media is still very addicted to it and clearly isn’t mature enough to have something like that. I don’t want to be the cause of if something happens to her if I tell her that she has done things wrong and should have an open conversation with Frank but I really think that her and Frank have done things wrong and should have an open conversation. Sam has expressed that her desire to move groups but I think that her problems are only gonna get bigger. If she runs away from them. She needs to have this conversation with Frank and have the maturity to own up to the things she’s done wrong. also, I would reach out to a teacher from past experience of Frank doing a similar thing. I know that Sam is gonna turn on me as soon as I do. What should I do in order for them to resolve the conflict?