I wake up every day at 6:00 AM, and before I even have a moment to think about myself, my day has already begun.
My 12-year-old son depends on me for almost everything. I bathe him, get him dressed, and prepare him for school. Then comes the hardest part of my morning—I carry his 40kg wheelchair from the third floor down to the ground floor. Some days the lift doesn’t work. Even when it does, there are still stairs at the bottom, so I end up carrying both him and the chair separately.
By then, my back is already hurting. Some mornings I haven’t even eaten. But I just keep going. I don’t complain—I just do what needs to be done.
I drop him at school at 6:45 and walk back home slowly, often lost in my thoughts, wondering what more I can do with my life. I rest for about 30 minutes, then get ready again and take my wife to work. After that, I come back home to prepare breakfast for my other two children and hand things over to the person who looks after them.
At 9:30, I head out again to pick up my son. By the time we get home, it’s around 10:00. I help him shower and use the toilet, and before I know it, another 30 minutes has passed.
Then it’s time to take my other children to school. We walk, so it takes time. By the time I’m done, it’s around 11:20. Later in the day, I go out again—one child needs to be picked up at 1:00 and the other at 2:00.
And that’s my day. Every single day.
Because of this routine, I can’t commit to normal working hours. No matter my education, qualifications, or experience, it feels like none of that matters. No employer wants someone with a schedule like mine.
Taking care of my children is not my worry—I will always do that, no matter how hard it gets.
What keeps me awake at night is the debt.
I’ve been carrying it for the past 10 years—mostly from medical expenses for my son, my late sister, and my late mother. It didn’t come from luxury or bad decisions. It came from trying to take care of the people I love.
I’ve tried everything I can think of. I’ve tried leasing or selling my land. I’ve done taxi driving whenever I get the chance. I even tried online trading. Nothing has worked long term. I even tried selling the land I own, but that hasn’t worked out either.
Yesterday, things got worse. Someone I owe money to threatened me and my wife. This happened after I told them honestly that I might not be able to pay this month because I’ve been without work, even though I recently got a job on April 26 and have been paying as much as I can every month.
At this point, I feel stuck.
I’m not sharing this to complain. I’m sharing this because I honestly don’t know what else to do anymore. If anyone has been in a situation like this, or has advice—especially on managing debt, dealing with situations like this, or finding a way to earn with a schedule like mine—I would truly appreciate it.