I feel evil for wanting to get evaluated
Well! I will keep things short, but I will say that I have a lot of signs that point toward ASD, and my life is, frankly, kind of unbearable. My family has always been against giving me 'labels' or 'making it medical' despite being obviously uncommon since always, and I have reaped the privilege of a label-free, diagnosis-free life where people don't treat me badly because they know I have a certain condition, and if I get assessed and end up getting diagnosed, I feel like I am throwing it away or being shitty and evil towards people who dealt with their own issues from early diagnosis. I still hold onto hope that they will tell me I am not autistic but instead have another condition, which is treatable, but it is honestly not enough to stop me from feeling like I am somehow being unfair.
Am I the only one? I feel like I cannot be.