My (soon to be ex) Husband 34M, called me dumb (wife 27F).
I admire my husband for being smart. He works as a mechanical engineer and I like smart guys.
I became an F1 fan and I had this thought in my mind that maybe, JUST MAYBE, like a random thought, I can become an engineer too. So I asked him how to get started to become an engineer. I am not really smart, just an average person intellectually.
His answer is like a knife: "You need to have a brain first." He said it in a very nonchalant way, not even joking, but even if he has been, it still would have hurt.
To which I replied: "I have a brain, may not be as smart as you but I do." I was smiling when I said it because it feels lighter thinking he might be joking. Then the insult came.
He said: "Took you long time to pass your Maths Qualification."
I just stayed silent. I am a mum, I do all the chores in the house, he pays all the bills. I work as well. I have a lot going on and he knows that, medical stuf and problems, that's why I couldn't work on it most of the time.
One time he even said: "Maybe if you were slimmer I would be more attracted to you.", when I asked him why we aren't having sex. 2 months now btw. And 3 last time.
Anyway, are smart men really bad at being empaths or being emotionally intelligent? We were trying to fix the marriage but he doesn't seem to understand how he says things are too harsh. Or am I just too soft and emotional?