Name regret after NICU stay
My daughters are 3 months old. They were born at 36 weeks, I had an emergency C section due to IUGR with high risk twins and they immediately went to the NICU. Twin A was there 5 days, and Twin B was there 29 days. After delivery, I had severe preeclampsia and was treated in the hospital for 5 days.
When I was pregnant my husband and I had a really hard time choosing names. We found one we both loved for Twin A and have never wavered in it, but Twin B was a lot harder. For Twin B we decided to go with Charlotte, and called her that all the time in my 3rd trimester, but I was never 100% sure and wanted to meet and get to know her first before making a final decision. A couple weeks before they came, I told my husband I wasn’t 100% on Twin B’s name, but he said he thought I was just getting cold feet and that we had already decided and not to second guess it, so we just tabled the discussion.
I didn’t get to see them the first 24 hrs after they came due to my preeclampsia issues, and after that we got to see them 1-2 hrs a day in the NICU, but visits were hard. Twin B was always sleeping, was in an isolette, and was covered in wires and hard to hold (always desatted immediately) so bonding and getting to know her was tough. Twin A was in an open cot and didn’t have as many issues so she was easier to bond with. I felt like I didn’t really know Twin B, and there was a lot of pressure from the nurses to complete her name paperwork so we decided to go with Charlotte since we had already discussed it. We felt like it was a safe choice (pretty and well known, full name is traditional but has cute nicknames). That said, I’ve thought about changing it every day since then.
I like Charlotte and think it’s pretty, but I don’t love it. I also really hate how popular it is. I just saw it was the #2 most popular name in 2025 and my heart sank. But at this point, we’ve been calling her Charlotte for 3 months. She has a bunch of nicknames we call her (Charlie, Char, Chucky, Chuckster), and it suits her personality, so it feels like it’s too late to change. I always imagined a less common (but not unknown) name for her, I want her to feel unique and not just one of a ton of Charlottes. I feel like when people hear her name they think “oh here’s another Charlotte”. I think if she wasn’t in the NICU and we could’ve bonded more, I would have named her something different.
My husband loves the name Charlotte and he really drove the name decision convo since I was dealing with a lot medically. He has a very common name and said it never bothered him growing up or as an adult. He’d rather keep it as is, but is open to changing it or calling her something else since it’s bothering me so much. I feel like she’s already her own person though, and that I should’ve been more vocal/firm about my doubts when I was pregnant, and that it’s just too late. Has anyone else dealt with something similar or have any advice?