I’m three weeks into a new job and already at my breaking point with a coworker.
For context, I have 9 years of experience in the wine industry, so I’m not coming in completely green. From day one, this guy has had an issue with me for reasons I genuinely don’t understand. He’s been passive aggressive, condescending, and straight up rude - not just privately, but in front of customers.
On my first day, I asked a couple normal questions about the wine list and he responded with, “You’re so fucking amazing and so great, you should know this by now.” That pretty much set the tone.
Since then, it’s been constant undermining, little digs, and occasional outright humiliation on the floor. Some days he’s tolerable, other days he acts like I’m incompetent in front of guests, which obviously affects my sales, tips, and confidence.
The confusing part? He’ll randomly flip and compliment me - say I have great customer service or strong sales - and then go right back to being awful. It’s honestly giving me whiplash.
This past weekend was kind of the last straw. We were working with a newer associate (literally her second day), and while she was ringing up a customer, he physically grabbed the iPad out of her hands mid-transaction. It was uncomfortable to watch and completely unnecessary.
On top of that, he openly complains about us to customers; calling us useless, saying we don’t know anything, etc. Meanwhile, I’ve already personally received multiple complaints from customers about HIS behavior in just three weeks.
Here’s the tricky part: he’s been with the company for 4 years, he’s a strong salesman, and he has regulars who come in specifically for him. Management is aware of his behavior and has documented issues with him before, but nothing really changes…. I’m guessing because he brings in money.
I really like my manager and respect her a lot, and I know she’s tried to address things. But at this point, I’m showing up to shifts anxious when I know I’m working with him. I’m uncomfortable, and honestly I don’t even like being alone on shift with him because of how he treats me.
I’m planning to talk to my manager about the most recent incident, but I feel like my only real option is to ask not to be scheduled with him anymore… which sucks, because I don’t want to limit my availability or feel pushed out of a job I otherwise like.
Has anyone dealt with a coworker like this - especially one management won’t touch because they’re “valuable”? How did you handle it?