Roommate driving me insane and idk what to do
Okay so for some background, I (22F) have lived with my roommate (26F) for about a year. Things have honestly been tense for a while. I don’t think she’s malicious, but I do think she’s pretty inconsiderate and avoidant when it comes to shared living stuff.
I recently called our leasing office because I thought our lease ended July 1st, and they informed me we’re actually month to month now. They said my options were basically to move out June 30th or stay another full month until July 31st. Since I had already been planning on moving out around July 1st anyway, I chose June 30th.
I texted my roommate to let her know and explained that if she wanted to stay, she’d need to work things out with the leasing office because my dad is currently the co-signer on the apartment. She got really upset and said this was way too short notice and that she thought she had until the end of July to find a roommate.
The thing is, I genuinely thought we were on the same page about me moving out around this time already. I acknowledged there may have been a misunderstanding, but this wasn’t some sudden change of plans on my end.
For context, I’ve also been gone for several weeks. I came back to the apartment after this conversation and the Brita was empty, there was no toilet paper in the bathroom, etc. These are recurring issues I’ve brought up multiple times before, but I let it go.
Then the next morning I found her vibrator sitting on my side of the bathroom counter (we have designated sides). I have contamination OCD and she knows this, so that really upset me. She apologized and said it was an accident after cleaning it, which I accepted.
But what’s frustrating to me is that she only seems to bring up issues with me when I’m already bringing something up with her. For example, after I addressed the bathroom situation, she suddenly brought up “moldy food” in the fridge that was distressing her. The “moldy food” was a piece of parmesan with slight mold on the rind in a sealed ziplock bag that I didn’t know about because I literally haven’t been home in weeks.
I guess I’m wondering if I’m being unreasonable here or if this dynamic would frustrate other people too. Because I feel like every issue turns into deflection instead of just addressing things directly when they happen.