Manager at new job making things unbearable. Give up or continue trying?
I’m at a loss as to what to do, and would appreciate any advice. I fought hard to secure a great job on paper at a good company and started about half a year back.
Firstly, the team is extremely stretched. I mostly have to work every weekend just to feel like I’m keeping up, or to reduce anxiety for next week. I have very little time to myself out of work, and there’s no WFH policy here.
Secondly, maybe what makes this job tougher is my manager. She’s starting to show her true colors. I consider myself quite tolerant, but feel she’s becoming increasingly unreasonable as time passes. As an example, recently she came over asking for information out of the blue, I couldn’t open the document due to a technical glitch, and got scolded for it. I’ve noticed she’s quite impatient and gets annoyed easily with small things in general, and another colleague from a different department noticed the same thing about her.
I hate to think I might have to quit because of my manager but whenever I think about it, I feel like she’s the one blocker to me being able to survive the role. Yes, the workload here is extremely high but that’s ok with me. Her being so hard to please is what adds a significant layer of difficulty because I have to walk on eggshells around her. Every day I get at least one negative comment from her, when things go well she doesn’t praise but when I accidentally miss something she’ll be sure to bring it up. She keeps saying to not feel shy to ask questions, but her personality is frankly scaring me off and making me feel like I’m not in a supportive environment to learn and be nurtured. Sometimes I ask a question only to see an annoyed look on her face. It doesn’t help that I’ve had to deal with a loved one passing away unexpectedly in a horrific incident after I started this job, and don’t have much time or energy to process it honestly, so I’m feeling very sensitive and vulnerable emotionally.
I hate to give up without putting up a strong fight, but with everything going on in my personal life I feel like I just don’t have the mental resilience and fortitude I used to, to power through this and come out stronger. I’m very unhappy everyday and have not been able to eat, sleep or manage my stress well. I don’t know if I’m just fighting against the impossible or whether there’s actually more I can do to improve the situation. I am truly grateful I managed to land this job in a difficult market after being unemployed for a year, and ideally would like to stay at least a year so it can have a bit more weight on my resume but everyday has been a struggle to get through so far. Really, really would appreciate anyone’s advice if you’ve gone through something similar 🙏 TIA.