As the title states I don't particularly like giving my mother money.
I am 21 y/o student studying at a decent uni in the UK, I don't work not fully because I don't want to I've applied to my fair share or retail jobs and internship opportunities with no success, I will also continue applying this throughout this summer for a working wage and any sort of experience.
The reason I feel bad about this is because I live with my mother, (she's a great mother btw so nothing particularly ill on her part), she however due to some health issues has cut down on working almost entirely and has began a side hustle. Although she works hard she only makes a deficit which I try to make her see but she is mostly boasts that either it's part of the process or that believes the revenue she gets from her hustle is a profit.
As you prolly could have guessed we live in a low income household and receive benefits from the government and ultimately these benefits are enough to supply the entire household with some minor help, however the money she loses just trumps eats heavily into the benefits.
This is where I come in, as a uni student from a low income household I receive maintenance loans which is around 8k a year which is see as a lot of money. Now ultimately I don't mind too much send money from my maintenance loan to my mother because she has did so much for me and my siblings, i also don't go out much and am don't particularly make big money spending so it doesn't really hinder me as of now (I know it's a loan and that I have to pay it back someday). Sometimes however it gets excessive to the point when the next payment comes in I start of with 0 due to stuff like overdraft and credit card payment. Paying for unnecessary business items. As of right now I'm maxed out on both.
This problem I have is now is that obviously understanding the pattern this time I decided to withdraw some money from my main account beforehand about £200 and decided to start a hustle of my own online, didn't particularly get much out of it in these past few weeks but have accumulated about £600. Which I know isn't that much but it's the first money I have actually made which is something I like. I keep this money hidden and when she asks for money I tell her I don't have any.
I can't help but feel bad, but Id feel even worse giving the hidden money away, knowing that it most of it is pointless spending.
I just want to say a few things at the end, I don't have a job and am looking to get one I've applied to different living wage jobs like an Amazon warehouse worker to stuff like retail and hotel assistants and a bunch of those online remote ai jobs. In which I get rejected each and every time I know that if I had a job it would be so much easier. I am not too focused on the load repayments and I don't particularly have any plans for my secret £800s it just feels nice to have.