To go to grad school or to not go to grad school. Decision paralysis.
Seeking advice because I am experiencing decision paralysis . Apologies in advance this is rambling nothingness. I am 24 about to turn 25 for context. I feel like if I don't start the grad journey soon, I wont want to walk away from a stable job in the future. If I am to take the leap, I reckon it should be now?
I currently have a job in my field and recently received a a 40% promotion. there is some weird uncomfortable and frankly upsetting work politics at my current job. That said, I am paid decently and my bosses have indicated I would be stepping up into more of a coordinating role and mentorship role etc. I can continue helping to build the program.
I also got into a funded grad program 20k stipened, 10k summer job with partner institution, again very much in my field. ( the botanic space).
I have absolutely no idea what to do. I have the option to defer the grad program for a year but am realizing it may not be necessary for me to advance in my career especially if I get another year of experience under my belt. (about 4 years). If I defer thought, in theory, I could save money for a year, and put it away in retirement funds etc.
I applied because 1. I wanted to do research, I wanted to challenge myself, I wanted to be taken seriously, I wanted to get paid better after the fact etc(I was under the impression that I was stuck at my pre-promotion pay sans masters). I wanted at one point to be a research associate affiliated with a university extension or botanic garden. . . I would of course need a PhD for that but I am afraid to commit to the time. I still think this is my dream job. . . but I could also see an alternative universe where I was happy not actually doing research but more science communications or something adjacent. IDFK.
that said... I might as well bite the bullet and maybe just jump into this program but. . . . . idk. IDK really what a masters will do for be to be honest? If I go into the program I will do the most to maximize what I get out of it but oh my gosh.
I love my job currently but don't love the city I live in . . . and I am also really over the work politics and what not. Really over it. My heart hurts most days I go to work.
Accepting would mean moving across the country... which I am nervous about but okay with... I would likely be able to get a job post grad in my home state because I would be working with a botanic institution and they are all pretty well connected. Plus, I have a good network here already. . .
I don't know. Accepting any and all thoughts.