u/Curiousjlynn

I rarely get cold sores. I have been getting them since I was 18 I am 34 now. Usually three times a year. I have a Valtrex script but it’s only to take when I fee one coming on. Like take four and 12 hours later take four.

I am so careful. My husband has never caught it.

Today I kissed my baby 6weeks, this morning. I also warmed a bottle in the warmer and put it near my lips/mouth to make sure the nipple wasn’t too hot. (I’ll never do that again)

That was at 9 this morning. I took a nap around 11 and woke up at 1 with a the little bump I always get. I took my valtrex and haven’t kissed and washed hands religiously since.

I am so scared she is going to develop them and worse a serious reaction that can make her go blind? Affect her heart and brain and liver.

I didn’t think I could never kiss her because I get cold sores. I didn’t notice anything then. Now I’m terrified.

I’ve read on Reddit parents have done this and it’s been ok.

Has anyone experienced this? I feel so guilty. I am so strict with hygiene and safety. I can’t beleive I did this. I didn’t feel it. I could never forgive myself.

I have taken my valtrex and don’t have any visible blisters just the little bump I usually get and stop it from continuing.

My 5 week old (today) slept 12 am to 4:30 and then 5:30 to 8 am.

This is the most sleep I’ve had in in 5 weeks.

I just had to share. Will it keep up? Probably not but I slept! I slept!!

I have a four week old, I am I a first time mom and had a difficult pregnancy. I miscarried in June, then when we got pregnant again I started bleeding a lot. It was a subchorionic hemorrhage. Bled until 12 weeks. That was scary in itself.

I was high risk for preeclampsia. Developed hypertension early on. By 22 weeks I needed an emergency cerclage and was on restrictions until I was induced due to preeclampsia which turned into an emergency c section.

I did everything I could to keep her safe.

I am now with my baby overnight and all day because my husband works. He takes baby 7-midnight so I can get uninterrupted sleep.

However I feel so anxious about everything. I don’t want him to clean bottles, make formula. I take care of everything. I dress her in what she wears, I restock all the baby things, diapers, clothes, wipes, formula.

I basically have decided on everything for her, down to swaddles and what I deem safe (following recommendations) safe sleep, how much she eats, how much gas drops she gets. Ect

I do this because I feel like if I don’t he will make a mistake. Ontop of this, when he is with the baby I can’t rest. I hate the way he picks her up, I hate the way he feeds her. I worry about him falling asleep with her (he hasn’t done this) I worry after a day of work he won’t have patience with her and something will go wrong. He isn’t as attentive as I am, or that’s how I see it.

I correct him a lot. This I don’t think makes him feel good. But I can’t stop. I am an ECE. I worked with infants and toddlers for 5 years before this so I have more experience/patience I think.

When I have my time to sleep, I literally can’t. I listen and worry. Often I’ll go downstairs and take over because I have so much anxiety. I am so burnt out and feel awful.

I’m feel awful that I don’t trust him, and I don’t know why.

I feel awful because I’m mentally doing everything. I am her primary caregiver and I feel I know her better than he does.

Is this PPA? Should I get help? Is it normal?

Any other new moms have this feeling?