Today is my day 100 of consistent meditation twice a day. And I still can not say for sure, what positive changes did it make to my life, if any.
I still can not observe my thoughts like from distance.
I can't observe the genesis of my emotions, like it described in books.
I'm not even sure if I became calmer in general or not.
The one thing that changed for sure, is sessions time.
I started with 10 minutes with struggling, now it is 16-22 mins easily.
It is a bit sad, that I am progressing much slower than I would like to (maybe my ADHD is the issue, not sure).
At the same time, I don't feel like I need additional motivation to continue. Meditations just became a part of each morning and evening now.
I will keep trying, hopefully things changes one day :)