u/Crazy-Old-Stories

▲ 58 r/Crazy_retro_stories+1 crossposts

40 years ago today: the new 'compact disc' technology - will it take ten or twenty years for people to replace their vinyl collections? (CNN Showbiz Today, May 13, 1986)

u/Crazy-Old-Stories — 11 hours ago

Notorious crime: the bizarre "Neighborhood Sport" of torturing and murdering Sylvia Likens (TIME, 60 years ago; not for the faint of heart)

[This was the basis of the 1989 novel The Girl Next Door by Jack Ketchum and the 2007 film An American Crime starring Elliot Page and Catherine Keener.]

Trials: Addenda to De Sade

TIME

May 5, 1966

Seated on folding chairs in a packed Indianapolis courtroom last week was the largest array of defendants to stand trial for a single murder in Indiana his tory. It was also one of the most bizarre: a wispy-haired 90-lb. woman, three of her children and two teen-age neighbor boys. As outlined by police, their story seemed almost unbelievably ugly.

It started last July, when 16-year-old Sylvia Marie Likens was left with her sister, Jenny, 15, in the care of Mrs.

Gertrude Baniszewski, 31, a divorced mother of six. Mrs. Baniszewski had offered to board the Likens girls, whom her children had met at a neighbor’s house, for $20 a week while their par ents traveled the Midwest fair circuit.

A pretty lass who liked the Beatles and roller skating, Sylvia was nicknamed Cookie and described by a girl friend as “a sweet nut.” With her few possessions — her most treasured was a jewelry box in which she kept two favorite pins —Sylvia moved into Mrs. B.’s rundown house in an Indianapolis blue-collar neighborhood.

Slaps & Punches. For two months, things went pleasantly enough. Then one day Paula Baniszewski, now 11, hit Sylvia on the jaw so hard that Paula broke her wrist. Paula’s mother took to slapping Sylvia for ever more frequent, if imagined, offenses. She did not complain to her parents when they made a visit in early October. After that, her tormentors became increasingly sadistic. John Baniszewski Jr., now 13, and two neighbor boys, diabetic Richard Dean (“Ricky”) Hobbs and Coy Hubbard, both 15, joined the laceration game. Sylvia was burned with matches and cigarettes, whipped with a heavy leather belt, hit on the head with a paddle and broom. A 14-year-old girl who visited the house recalled: “It was ‘Sylvia, do this’ and ‘Sylvia, do that’ all the time, and when she didn’t do it, they would beat her.”

Forbidden to eat at one point, she was seen consuming scraps from a garbage can. Oct. 6 was her last day at school. Concerned by Sylvia’s absence from church, the pastor dropped in to inquire about her, was told by the woman that the girl was being kept home because she stole things. At the time, Sylvia was tied to an upstairs bed, forbidden water or the use of the bathroom.

By now, torturing Sylvia had become a neighborhood sport, with at least four other youngsters taking part. Even Shirley Baniszewski, 10, and Sister Marie, 11, joined in. So did Stephanie, 15, whom Sylvia had accused of being a prostitute. In fact, John Jr. told police, at one time or another everyone in the family except Mrs. B.’s 18-month-old baby had burned Sylvia with cigarettes. Polio-crippled Jenny Likens was occasionally forced on pain of beating to join the assault on her sister.

Brands & Salt. Around mid-October, after Sylvia had wet her bed, Mrs. B. ordered her to sleep thereafter in the basement on a pile of filthy rags, along with the family’s two dogs. Later, according to Hobbs, Mrs. B. told Sylvia, “Now I’m going to brand you.” A three-inch sewing needle was heated with matches and, Hobbs said, “Gertie started putting words on her, but she got sick and told me to finish it.” Etched in two tiers of inch-high block letters across Sylvia’s lower abdomen, the words said: “I’m a prostitute and proud of it.” Two days later, Hobbs added, he used the hooked end of a 2-ft.-long anchor bolt that had been heated with burning newspapers to brand the numeral 3 on Sylvia’s chest.

About 2:30 the next morning, Sylvia, by then in what officials described as a state of “profound apathy,” made what was apparently her only effort to get help. Using a coal shovel, she scraped on the basement floor for almost two hours. A woman next door was awakened and on the verge of calling police when the scraping stopped. That afternoon, as Sylvia lay moaning and mumbling incoherently on her pile of rags, Mrs. Baniszewski, Ricky, John B. Jr. and Paula sprinkled a box of soap powder on her, then added hot water. Afterward, John Jr. sprayed her with cold water from a garden hose.

“Only Pretending.” Carried upstairs to a bedroom, the girl was given a lukewarm bath, dressed in a pair of white Capri pants, and placed on a mattress on the floor. Mrs. Baniszewski struck Sylvia on each side of the head with a book and told her to get up, that she was only pretending to be sick. Mercifully, Sylvia died.

Called by her keeper, police found Sylvia’s body with arms crossed over her breast. Even to hardened cops, the sight was stomach wrenching. Virtually no part of the girl’s corpse was unmarked. Her fingernails had been broken upward; there were massive bruises on her temples; much of the skin on her face, chest, arms and legs had peeled from scalding water. Her lower lip had been bitten in two, presumably during her agony. The immediate cause of death was a blow on the skull. In all, Sylvia’s body bore an estimated 150 burns, cuts, bruises and other lesions. Said one veteran of more than 35 years on the force: “In all my years of experience, this is the most sadistic act I ever came across.”

In December, a grand jury indicted Gertrude Baniszewski, Paula, Stephanie and John Jr., along with Hubbard and Hobbs, on charges of first-degree murder. (Under Indiana law, minors face the same maximum penalty for murder as adults: the electric chair.) As the trial got under way last week before a jury of eight men and four women, Mrs. Baniszewski, John Jr. and Hubbard pleaded not guilty by reason of insanity; Paula, Stephanie and Ricky pleaded simply not guilty. Upstairs in an anteroom sat Sylvia’s parents, still not comprehending how and why it had happened. Sitting sunken-cheeked in court, her blue-veined legs crossed and swinging silver-stitched black slippers, Mrs. Baniszewski also looked puzzled by the whole affair. Shortly after her arrest, she had confided to police: “Sylvia wanted something in life. But I couldn’t figure out what it was.”

reddit.com
u/Crazy-Old-Stories — 1 day ago

Four from TIME 30 years ago: Princess Di chided for photo op; the Margot Kidder incident; Can George Clooney be a leading man?; Macaulay Culkin's parents

TIME May 6, 1996

u/Crazy-Old-Stories — 2 days ago

50 Years Ago the Church Committee exposes decades of FBI and CIA "Black Bag" jobs, pulls back the curtain on LSD testing, COINTELPRO, reveals 5 presidents ignored the law to spy on the public (TIME, May 10, 1976)

INVESTIGATIONS: Nobody Asked: Is It Moral?

TIME

May 9, 1976

It did not matter that much of the information had already been released —or leaked—to the public. The effect was still overwhelming: a stunning, dismaying indictment of U.S. intelligence agencies and six Presidents, from Franklin Roosevelt to Richard Nixon, for having blithely violated democratic ideals and individual rights while gathering information at home or conducting clandestine operations abroad.

The two-volume, 815-page report released last week by the Senate Select Committee on Intelligence was 15 months in the making. It documents as never before how the White House and the baronies of the Federal Bureau of Investigation and the Central Intelligence Agency took the law into their own hands in the cause of preserving liberty. To cure the sweeping excesses, the eleven-member Church committee—so named for its chairman, Idaho Democrat Frank Church—proposed some sweeping reforms, 183 in all. Yet many of the key reforms may well be gutted or killed by the full Senate.

Scarcely anyone who was involved in the operations—bugging phones, breaking into houses, slipping LSD to unsuspecting bar patrons, planning assassination attempts, undermining governments—seems to have wondered whether he was doing anything wrong. The values of the men who operated in the shadowy underground world were summed up by William C. Sullivan, for ten years the head of the FBI’s domestic intelligence division: “Never once did I hear anybody, including myself, raise the question: ‘Is this course of action … lawful, is it legal, is it ethical or moral?’ We never gave any thought to this line of reasoning, because we were just naturally pragmatic.”

Foremost among the pragmatists were the six Presidents, Democrats and Republicans alike. Before World War II, F.D.R. authorized wiretaps of suspected “subversives” without ever defining just what a subversive was. He also asked the FBI to file the names of Americans who criticized his national defense policies and supported those of Colonel Charles Lindbergh, who was then preaching isolationism. With similar Executive arrogance and in the same tradition, the Nixon Administration was installing illegal wiretaps and using the Internal Revenue Service to hound its domestic “enemies” 35 years later.

There was guilt aplenty to go round.

As U.S. Attorney General, Robert F. Kennedy gathered information on the “sugar lobby” by tapping ten telephone lines of one law firm, plus the phones of two lobbyists, three Executive Branch officials, a congressional staffer and North Carolina’s Congressman Harold D. Cooley, then chairman of the House Agriculture Committee. A squad of FBI men used informants, undercover agents and bugging to let Lyndon Johnson know what was happening behind the scenes at the 1964 Democratic convention in Atlantic City.

“Black Bag.” Trying to sniff out subversion, the FBI, the CIA, the Army and the National Security Agency violated Americans’ rights over the years by opening some 380,000 first-class letters, staging hundreds of “black bag” break-ins, securing copies of millions of private cables and tapping an unknown number of telephones.

With a paranoid compulsion, the agencies developed lists of troublesome or potentially troublesome Americans. These included members of organizations on the right (the John Birch Society, Ku Klux Klan) as well as the left (the Socialist Workers Party, Students for a Democratic Society). The FBI kept handy a list of people—26,000 strong at one point—who were to be detained during a national emergency (including Novelist Norman Mailer). The Army accumulated the names of 100,000 people who were involved, even tangentially, in political protest activities (including Illinois Senator Adlai Stevenson III, who made the list for merely attending a peaceful political rally watched by the service’s agents). The CIA surpassed everyone, maintaining a catchall index of 1.5 million names taken from the 250,000 letters opened and photographed by the agency. Noted the Senate report: “Too many people have been spied upon by too many Government agencies, and too much information has been collected.”

Looking for leads, the organizations would infiltrate almost anything. The

FBI dutifully investigated women’s liberation groups and decided to keep up the surveillance, even though they appeared to be concerned just with freeing “women from the humdrum existence of being only a wife and mother.” In 1941, the FBI began an intensive probe of the National Association for the Advancement of Colored People, after 15 black mess stewards in the Navy protested against racial discrimination. For 25 years, the bureau hunted for signs of Communist influence in the N.A.A.C.P., although a report in the first year of the investigation said the organization had a “strong tendency” to “steer clear of Communist activities.” There were more chilling examples of excesses by the FBI. Operation COINTELPRO (counterintelligence program), which sought to disrupt dissident groups, tried to get members of the Black Panthers and a black activist group based in California, US, Inc., to kill one another. The cold-eyed crusade against Martin Luther King Jr.—”the most dangerous and effective Negro leader in the country”—included not only the familiar taping of his bedroom activities but also plans to harass his widow after his assassination.

In the past year and a half, the U.S. intelligence community has taken a number of steps to correct its faults. The CIA has severely limited its activities at home. U.S. Attorney General Edward Levi has laid down some strict ground rules for the FBI. Even so, the Senate committee was unappeased. It recommended 96 steps to make sure that the domestic intelligence apparatus would concern itself only with the legitimate goals of catching spies and stopping crime, including acts of terrorism.

The committee urged the passage of laws limiting intelligence probes to terrorist action and hostile foreign espionage when there was a clear-cut and immediate danger, and the threat is certainly there. Of the 1,079 Soviet officials assigned to the U.S. in 1975, more than 60% were intelligence agents according to the FBI.

Own Airlines. The committee recommended that wiretapping, bugging and break-ins occur only after proper court orders. Within the U.S., the CIA would be permitted to act only to protect its own employees or infiltrate a domestic group to establish “cover” for a foreign intelligence mission.

In describing U.S. operations overseas, the committee noted that the CIA was so autonomous that it ran its own airlines and set up its own businesses to act as covers for agents and even created its own insurance companies, whose total assets amount to more than $30 million. More disturbing to the committee was the fact that the CIA put academics, newsmen and missionaries on its payroll and propagandized not only foreigners but Americans. CIA types wrote books backing up U.S. policy that were made available in the U.S.—sometimes after they had been favorably reviewed by other CIA types.

The report itself was evidence of the agency’s continuing clout. At the urgent request of CIA officials, some 200 pages of material on secret overseas operations were deleted from the final version, and many portions of the surviving text were heavily censored. These changes may have been justified, but the CIA even tried to delete transcripts of hearings that had already been publicly telecast. At this, however, the Senators plucked up their courage and drew the line.

The committee did get across its main point: from 1961 to 1975, the CIA conducted some 900 major covert operations overseas. Many of these not only were of questionable value but occurred without proper supervision by the White House or oversight by Congress.

For a while, the committee gave serious consideration to proposing a total ban on all covert activities, reasoning that they were simply incompatible with the tenets of a democratic society. But the final report concluded that the U.S. should be able to mount undercover operations to counter grave threats to the nation. Last February, President Gerald Ford announced new Executive guidelines to control the CIA’S covert activities, but the committee remained unsatisfied, insisting that the restrictions be made even tougher and written into law.

To establish clear-cut responsibilities and lines of authority for foreign and domestic intelligence operations, the committee recommended the formation of a special watchdog committee in the Senate (leaving it up to the House to enter into a joint committee later on, if it wishes). Under the reorganization recommended by the Senators, the new committee would be able to pass on the foreign intelligence budget (which is now considered so vital a secret that the figure—estimated at about $10 billion —was eliminated from the report at the request of the CIA). What is more, the President would be compelled by law to inform the committee before any significant undercover operation was undertaken—thereby giving the members a chance to object to, although not veto the enterprise. Political assassinations would be forbidden by statute, as they now are by Ford’s decree. In addition, the committee would ban by law any attempt to subvert a democratic government—a step that Ford says he favors.

There are already strong indications that the Senate is not prepared to approve the radical new reforms or even the creation of a new oversight committee. G.O.P. Senators John Tower and Barry Goldwater refused to sign the report, arguing that its strict recommendations would make it impossible for the CIA to operate effectively. The proposed change, said Tower, vice chairman of the committee, “could endanger American security.”

Heated Issue. Under the present law, six committees on the Hill (three in the Senate and three in the House) are charged with overseeing intelligence operations. Their oversight has been infrequent and ineffectual. Yet their chairmen are reluctant to share any power. In addition, Church and his allies face another problem as they try to push through their proposals: growing apathy. Because the whole process has taken so long, and so much has been written and said, controlling the CIA is no longer a heated political issue. The substantial reforms initiated by Ford, the CIA and the Department of Justice have also eased the pressure.

There is, finally, a real fear among some Senators that a committee so powerful and fully informed could do profound damage if it sprang any leaks. Last week the Senate Rules Committee voted 5 to 4 against proposals by the Church committee to set up a new watchdog unit to keep an eye on the intelligence agencies. But the fight is not over yet. This month Church plans to carry the struggle to the floor of the Senate, where he feels the younger liberals in both parties may help him carry the day. The “crucial” element of reform, says Church, is a committee that can pass on the CIA’s budget and learn about its planned covert activities in advance. Adds Minnesota’s Walter Mondale, chairman of the subcommittee on domestic operations: “In the past, Congress has been able to excuse its lack of vigilance on the grounds that it didn’t know [what was happening]. Now it does. And if we know it and don’t do anything about it, then we’re really saying, ‘O.K., let ‘er rip.’ “

---

Notes: Frank Church, chairman of the committee, was running for president int the Dem primary at the time (but this issue of TIME had a cover story on Carter and admittted he was almost guaranteed to win by that point).

We now know that in 1973, CIA Director Richard Helms ordered the destruction of all MKUltra files to hide the evidence from the Church Committee. It wasn't until a Freedom of Information Act request in 1977 that 20,000 surviving documents were found, revealing that the CIA had been running over 150 sub-projects involving electroshock, hypnosis, and "psychic driving" (looping recorded messages to brainwash subjects).

The reason the CIA founded their own private insurance companies to cover their secret assets was because no public insurance company would touch "ghost" planes and "non-existent" employees.

reddit.com
u/Crazy-Old-Stories — 4 days ago
▲ 18 r/Crazy_retro_stories+1 crossposts

40 years ago, Frank Miller discusses his new "Dark Knight Returns" series in SPIN magazine - his Batman is a 'demon' & a 'radical'; Superman is the conservative; "we live in an aheroic age" (May 1986)

Here Comes the Knight

“This is the scene in which the Joker feeds poisoned cotton candy to a troop of Boy Scouts,” chuckles Frank Miller, displaying a sheet of rough layouts from his latest big project — a four-part, 200-page work called The Dark Knight Returns. It’s a revisionist pop epic about Batman's middle-aged return from a brooding retirement. The series takes place sometime early in the next century, but it revives the violent film noir tone of the '40s. Miller explains:  “I’m emphasizing his more malign qualities.” He indicates some horizontal squiggles in the next panel: "Those are the dead boy scouts.”

 Miller began shaking up the insular, inbred world of comics in 1979 when, at the tender age of 22, he moved to Manhattan from Vermont to take over the drawing chores on Marvel's long-running Daredevil series. Though he looked back to such idols as Will Eisner (creator of The Spirit), his style was immediately distinctive. He sliced the page space into thin slivers, shattered it, threw thick shadows across it at extreme, expressionistic angles. "This is not illustration, ' Miller asserts of his boldly stylized approach to the medium. "This is cartooning.

When Miller took over the writing of Daredevil a year later, he brought the storytelling into even tighter congruence with his drawing, spinning intense underbelly-of-the-city yarns full of mixed motives, petty thugs, seductive female assassins, and bands of marauding Ninja. He left Marvel in 1983, jumping over to the company's chief rival, DC Comics. to create the six-part Ronin. a futuristic exploration of his favorite Japanese martial-arts motifs.

Though Miller is again working on-four Daredevil-related projects, it's the freewheeling Batman miniseries, which debuted last month, that will probably make the biggest splash. Miller’s violent, no-batshit approach reanimates the Caped Crusader as a killer, a vigilante, a figure of controversy hunted by the authorities, a stalking beast of the urban jungle.

Now in middle age, Bruce Wayne's aiter ego won't leave him in peace: "In my gut,” says Bruce, “the creature writhes and snarls and tells me what l, need.”

'My Batman series has a really grim portrait of how the world works,” explains Miller. “One of the reasons comics aren't doing as well as they used to is that the characters are completely out of date, particularly in social and political terms. We live in frightening times, yet these superhero comics give a benevolent picture of the world.”

Miller calls Batman a “demon,” as if he's not even human anymore: “I went so far as to make the non-Batman personality of Bruce Wayne essentially the character of a man who's a werewolf. Bruce refers to himself as a 'host body’ at one point.

I have his Batman Side speak to him as if it were a separate entity, saying things like. 'l am your soul. You try to drown me out, but your voice is weak.”

If Bruce Wayne is 50 years old, Dark Knight must be a futuristic story. 'Actually it isn't. though technically it has to be set in the future because the story ignores the current Batman continuity. But for me its specifically contemporary. The president in it is a not-very-carefully-disguised parody of Reagan.

“One of the main themes is that we live in an aheroic age. Batman's being out of place is an important part of the story. Everything he does is illegal, he's up against authority. It culminates with Batman having to fight Superman, who is also in his '50s. But Batman isn't a reactionary, he's a radical. The only conservative character in the series is Superman, who takes his orders directly from the-president and helps track down welfare violators.”

— Brian Cronenworth

u/Crazy-Old-Stories — 2 days ago

Just 50 years ago, a North Carolina woman was charged with witchcraft under a 1952 law - she collected skulls, conducted seances, and drove a Gremlin named 'Dark Shadows' (Newsweek, May 3, 1976)

A REAL-LIFE GHOST STORY

Little Morganton, N.C. (population: 15,000) is probably best known as the home of Watergate hero Sam Ervin. But just two blocks past Ervin's home on Lenoir Street lives another Morganton celebrity, Mrs. Joann Denton—a middle-aged, miniskirted former go-go dancer and Sunday-school teacher who works at a center for retarded children, but is best known as the town witch.

For most of the five years Mrs. Denton has lived in Morganton, her mystical dabblings were considered a colorful eccentricity—her house with its skulls and her automobile (a Gremlin) both bear the name "Gray Shadows"—and at times were a positive asset. The money she collected from children who stopped to visit on Halloween, for example, was turned over to the local rescue unit. But this week, Mrs. Denton was scheduled to go on trial under a little-used 1952 "witchcraft" law following the death of another Morganton woman—on precisely the day that had been predicted at one of Mrs. Denton's séances.

The dead woman, Mrs. Dorothy Ramsey, 38, had never actually heard her own demise predicted; family sources said she was told of it by her estranged husband, Fred Warren Ramsey, 42, who lives in an apartment house owned by Mrs. Denton. Ramsey and Mrs. Denton had become somewhat chummy, townspeople recalled, he helping her to spruce up vacant apartments and lay carpeting. Ramsey also became involved in some of her séances—including two on March 17 and 20 at which he said he hoped to make contact with his wife's dead son-in-law. It was at these sessions, participants said, after the usual table-tilting and ghostly knocking, that Dorothy Ramsey's destiny was suddenly brought up. "I see death... look above my shoulder and see who it is," ordered Mrs. Denton. Ramsey described a woman with black hair, then wept: "It's Dot. It's Dot."

That vision and others apparently led Ramsey to tell his wife she would die on April 10, most probably in an auto accident. The news was clearly disturbing to Mrs. Ramsey, who had a history of nervous breakdowns and had received shock treatments, according to her daughter Kathy. On the morning of April 10, Mrs. Ramsey refused to leave her house; "she seemed nervous," said Kathy, "like she was scared to get in her car." She died that night, with empty bottles of tranquilizers strewn in her apartment. An autopsy showed a high level of drugs and alcohol in her bloodstream, and her death was listed as suicide.

Next day, Mrs. Denton sent a pink carnation to the funeral parlor to be pinned to the dead woman's lapel—"just like it was some kind of hex," according to daughter Kathy, who quickly sought police action against the spiritualist whose visions had proven so prophetic. A detective remembered the old witchcraft law (originally passed to prevent fortune-telling by roving gypsy bands) and a warrant was issued. Some of the dead woman's relatives also hinted that her estranged husband had recently taken out an insurance policy on her, but that turned out to be simply an accident policy on himself—with no payoff as a result of the suicide.

Mrs. Denton was apparently untroubled by the possible sentence facing her (a maximum fine of $500 and six months in jail). "With the powers of my mind, I could [practice black magic] if I wanted to, but I'm no devil witch sticking pins in people," she declared, sitting amid the Lord's Prayer samplers that fill her home. "I'm a very religious person."

—DAVID M. ALPERN with JOSEPH B. CUMMING JR.

----

Notes: She was charged under a North Carolina law prohibiting the practices of fortune telling, clairvoyance and phrenology (i.e. feeling the bump's on someone's skull). This law has since been repealed.

She appeared in court April 27, 1976 and the charges against her were dropped.

She ran for mayor of Morganton in the 1981 election.

She sued the town of Morganton for her removal from the 1993 Morganton Downtown Halloween Parade.

reddit.com
u/Crazy-Old-Stories — 5 days ago

"Truck ’em easy now, Apple Betty. Double nickles on the dime": The CB radio craze of the mid-70s (TIME article, 50 years ago)

Modern Living: THE BODACIOUS NEW WORLD OF C.B.

TIME

May 9, 1976 9:00

This cotton-picker name of Red Vine from the Dirty Side was rolling a pregnant skate through Watergate town other day when he passed the home twenty of lady breaker First Mama. There was no city kitty so, mercysakes, Red hammered off, keyed his rig and called “Breaker one-niner for KUY-9532. “Negative copy. That foxy lady wasn ‘t hanging out, didn ‘t have her ears on. Good buddy told her anyway, “You truck ’em easy now, Apple Betty. Eighty-eights and ten, roger and out.”

To the owners of 15 million Citizens Band radio sets, and some of the millions more who have become familiar with CB language from records and TV shows, the message was loud and clear: a nontrucker from New York City, whose CB nickname is Red Vine, was driving his Volkswagen through Washington when he passed the White House, home of fellow CB-Owner Betty Ford, whose radionym is First Mama (TIME, May 3). There were no cops around, so he slowed down and tried to reach her on his set, using her FCC-issued call number, but got no response. The attractive First Lady was not monitoring her set,* so Red Vine reminded her to drive safely, wished her love and kisses and signed off.

The cryptic, demotic jargon—and the Arkahoma accent in which it is invariably delivered no matter where in the U.S.—may seem outlandish to many. If so, they had better hang easy and adjust to it. From 8 to 10 million more CB sets will be sold in 1976, which with extra equipment could amount to some $2.5 billion worth—nearly as much as total sales of TV sets. One of the biggest manufacturers, Hy-Gain Electronics Corp. (maker of Betty Ford’s rig), reported that 1976 first-quarter sales quintupled those for the same period in 1975. A $2.95 paperback CB dictionary has sold more than a quarter of a million copies. “CB Land,” as enthusiasts call it, is served by a babel of newspapers, magazines, thousands of clubs and a lobby in Washington. The cult’s most celebrated recent convert after Betty Ford is Snoopy, who has found solace with CB in the Peanuts strip.

Three of the biggest U.S. electronics manufacturers decided this year to enter the lucrative market for what the song The White Knight described as “that Japanese toy, that trucker’s joy.” Most 1976 American cars can be bought with the sets installed; nearly half of all trucks in the U.S. are CB-equipped. The cost is relatively low—from about $90 to $350 for a serviceable set and antenna—and CB is simple to install in a truck, car or boat, drawing its power from the vehicle’s battery. The same units can be plugged in at home with inexpensive DC inverters to cut house voltage down to the 12 volts needed to go on the air. Portable units cost even less. The FCC estimates that in time there will be 60 million licensed CB sets in operation. As one industry executive says, “The more people are on the air, the more people want to join them on the air.”

Without doubt, simple, low cost, ubiquitous radio conversation represents the biggest explosion of communications since the invention of the telephone. Its cultural impact may not be as pervasive as television’s, but in an odd way, it is a creative one. TV is, after all, a nonparticipant pastime. CB radio, by contrast, is a two-way medium that enables everyman to write his own script. It has not only nourished a proliferating vocabulary that threatens to outdate any dictionary of American slang within months; as well, it catalyzes an egalitarian, anti-authoritarian philosophy that has never been expressed in this fashion before. In the TV series Movin’ On, hit records like C.W. McCall’s Convoy (which sold 5 million copies and is to be made into a film) and the movie White Line Fever —all of them CB oriented—the good guys v. the cops is a basic theme.

Such considerations were far from the collective mind of the FCC in 1945, when it set aside a sliver of the broadcast spectrum for the noncommercial use of ordinary citizens such as hunters, boaters, construction teams and farmers ranging far from homes and telephones. The first CB license was not granted until 1947. In the next quar ter-century, only 850,000 CB licenses were issued. Then came the 1973 oil embargo, speed limits were dropped to 55 m.p.h. (“double nickel” in CB argot) and truck drivers installed the units to warn each other of lurking cops (“smokey bears”) and radar cars (“Kojak with a Kodak”). Television news picked up the story, and the rest is hysteria.

Chaotic Delay. In January 1973, there were 26,682 CB license applications; in January 1975, 79,375; in January 1976, 544,742. At Gettysburg, Pa., where the FCC processes the applications, conditions have been hardly less chaotic than they were in July 1863. Unopened envelopes overflowed into the ladies’ lounge; the FCC fell two months behind. Last month the agency moved to cut the delay by allowing anyone who buys a set to obtain an immediate temporary permit on mailing in $4 and an application form.

While CB “radiddio” is widely used by truckers and ordinary drivers to warn of speed traps ahead, the network is highly esteemed by highway patrols and police for its ever-increasing role in reporting accidents, crimes, stolen cars, fires, traffic tie-ups, even reckless drivers (“Harvey Wallbangers”). Several volunteer organizations of CBers have sprung up to monitor the air waves and provide round-the-clock emergency services. The biggest, called REACT (for Radio Emergency Associated Citizens Teams), claims more than 70,000 members in all 50 states, Puerto Rico, seven Canadian provinces and West Germany. Since its formation in 1962, REACT claims to have handled 35 million emergency calls, including 12 million highway accidents.

The social and economic background of CBers is changing rapidly. Once populated mostly by truckers and blue-collar hobbyists, CB land is attracting growing numbers of businessmen and middle-class families who use the sets for safety and information. CB is also a “bodacious” (in CB lingo, super, fantastic) way of relieving freeway tedium—so much so that truckers’ use of amphetamines has declined drastically in recent years. Ordinary drivers tend to be as evangelistic about the medium as oldtime gear jammers. “When I’m on the road these days,” says New York Businessman Lawrence LeKashman, “I’d sooner leave the spare tire behind than my CB.” Enthusiasts predict that CBs will some day be required equipment on all cars.

The macho world of CB is part soap and part horse opera. Says Amitai Etzioni, the eminent Columbia University sociologist: “A CB allows you to present a false self: to be beautiful, masculine, tall, rich, without being any of those things. Like the traveling salesman who drops into a singles bar and says he’s the president of his company, a person can project on the air waves anything he wants to be.” The person who installs a CB set and adopts a “handle” (nickname) and starts “modulating” on the air, is creating a character and reaching out to others while still maintaining anonymity. Adds Etzioni: “People in our kind of society, torn from our roots, want to relate without fully investing ourselves in a relationship, as we would if we joined a church group or worked on a campaign. With a CB, you can have personal contact with the turn of a dial. It is very controllable and protects you from getting too involved.”

CB is a godsend for many shut-ins and others who are isolated from the community. For some enthusiasts, like Mrs. Patricia Schey (“Kissy Face”) who monitors her “home base” 16 hours a day in Madison, Wis., it is more of a passion. Almost everyone, however, responds to what Manhattan Psychoanalyst Joel Kovel calls “CB’s element of voyeurism.” That aspect of the CB phenomenon has not been lost on Mitchell Brothers, the porno-film producers. They recently released an opus with the self-explanatory title C.B. Mamas.

Potty Mouths. The real CB land has more sinister denizens. Police departments across the country report that mobile radios are being used increasingly in holdups and burglaries. CB sets themselves have become the favorite target of street thieves; 500 CB thefts were reported in Los Angeles during a three-month period. Game poachers use CB to outwit conservation officers. Though the California department of fish and game frequently changes its code, admits one officer, “poachers seem to know what we’re doing before we do.” Prostitutes (“pavement princesses”) who plug their charms on CB have become so common that there is even a song about them, Rosie on the Ridge.

Potentially even more annoying is the widespread abuse of the channels —especially by so-called potty mouths using obscenities. The language on the Los Angeles air waves, says a sheriffs department engineer, Henry Richter, “is filthy. It’s a disgrace; it’s like a gutter.” “Uncle Charley” or “Candy Man,” as CBers call the FCC, also has a major problem with broadcasters who illegally use “hamburger helpers,” or linear amplifiers, to boost the output of standard 4-watt transmitters beyond their normal range of five to ten miles. Their beefed-up blat can splatter normal television and radio reception. Yet another migraine for the feds is CBers’ use of what they call “SBC,” for “sick bird channel” —”ill eagle” (illegal) use of channels reserved for vital services.

CB’s existing 23 channels are already badly overcrowded in metropolitan areas. Even Channel 9, which is supposed to be reserved for emergencies, is often invaded by mindless chitchatters (“ratchet-jaws”). Says James McKinney, FCC’s deputy chief of field operations: “I have a feeling that by 1979, all I’m going to hear is one loud buzz.” The FCC is working on a short-term solution: to expand the band to as many as 115 channels. But even that would be little more than, so to speak, a Band-Aid. Eventually, authorities agree, they will have to find a place on the radio spectrum for a second-generation band with 200 or more channels.

These problems are to be expected in so radical a coupling of social change and technological innovation. Questions about CB’s influence have not even been formulated. With a “good buddy” system of 100 million or more Americans speaking compulsively in inelegant private tongues, what will happen to the language of Jefferson and Henry James? Will future presidential candidates have to campaign by mike from the expressways—and learn to call them “double slabs”? Or will the whole CB cult simply go the way of goldfish swallowing and Hula-Hoops?

Talk Shows. That fate seems unlikely. CB provides too many valuable uses and affordable comforts to fade out. From Nastyville to Tricky Dick’s —Nashville to San Clemente in pre-CB parlance—the new radiddio offers a kind of openline talk show that entertains and instructs while conveying at best a genuine feeling of neighborliness never before associated with highway driving. “When you’re riding around and listening to these people,” says a Manhattan disc jockey, “what you hear is America at its best.” Well, not always. But there is a bodacious new world out there, and its people are talking to one another again and even exchanging eighty-eights.

* Or perhaps was listening in on one of the other 22 frequencies that CBers can tune to simply by switching a TV-like channel selector.

u/Crazy-Old-Stories — 5 days ago

40 years ago, the Joan Rivers and Roger Vadim stories mocked together on Saturday Night Live (Crazy SNL #11)

Two stories I posted last week: Joan Rivers announced she would ditch Carson and host the first show on the new Fox network; Roger Vadim's memoir about his sex life with Bardon, Deneuve & Jane Fonda.

Joan Rivers (Terry Sweeney), who has poached Ed McMahon from Carson, interviews Vadim's lovers.

u/Crazy-Old-Stories — 5 days ago

40 years ago, director Roger Vadim published an unsubtle memoir about sleeping with 3 of the hottest actresses (TIME, April 28, 1986)

Admittedly, two of them were his wives, but he was mainly concerned with their sex lives.

Another review, from the LA TIMES.

By Julia Cameron

June 15, 1986

BARDOT, DENEUVE, FONDA by Roger Vadim (Simon & Schuster: $17.95).

To those who have followed his egregiously public life, it should come as no surprise that Roger Vadim has chosen to make his privates public. Titled, “Bardot, Deneuve and Fonda,” his kiss-and-tell book about his former wives and lovers is an invasion not so much of their privacy as of his own. True, he tells us many ungallant tidbits about the women that they might not have wished to share with the public. In the act of doing so, he tells us far more about himself.

As he bemoans his fate: “How many times have journalists or casual acquaintances asked me: ‘What did Brigitte or Catherine or Jane Fonda see in you?’ ”

As he answers them: “For some, the secret was my performance in bed; for others, I was only a vehicle for success; and for still others, I was a Svengali capable of bewitching innocent young girls . . . either I am a cynical, debauched manipulator . . . or, a man outstripped by the talent and beauty of the women he loves. . . . “

To judge by the record Vadim sets forth, the answer might well be all of the above, but the significance of the events he records seems to elude him. As he phrases his dilemma, “. . . it is not easy to be totally objective when talking about oneself, and self-congratulations are embarrassing.”

One could call Vadim’s book self-serving--it must have been intended as such; it is no loving memoir despite its many affectionate protestations--but the book does its author a disservice. Far more naked than the women he publicly disrobes is Vadim’s own venality--not, perhaps, a word pressed widely into service among the worldly French. Although relentlessly presenting himself as a man of the world (Christian Marquand and Marlon Brando are “brothers” to him; just ask him), one cannot help wondering what world he really inhabits.

Can it be socially acceptable anywhere to write soft-porn descriptions of one’s former intimates? The answer, perhaps, is “yes, if done brilliantly,” but Vadim’s are hardly that. What he shares with Henry Miller is sexual obsession, not descriptive power. Bardot emerges dripping from the sea, but what really drips is her ex-husband’s prose: “Her face, streaming with drops of water, glistening in the sun like so many diamonds . . . a delicate neck, a thin waist that a man could encircle with two hands, a round, provocative and tender derriere that would have been the envy of Adonis and Aphrodite; perfectly curved hips, long, firm thighs . . . this sensual, glorious body.”

It might credibly be argued that all art is autobiographical, but it cannot be credibly argued that Vadim’s book is art. A slender vehicle, overfreighted by the ego of its author, it illuminates not the human soul but the human heel. Whatever lies and deceptions Vadim may have used to bed his “women”--and “the truth” is quite a seductive lie in the mouth of an older man--these lies are nothing compared to the elaborate rationales he builds for himself on his behaviors.

He writes of his philandering when married to young Jane Fonda: “. . . when I made love to another woman, I talked to Jane about it. . . . I desired that she be my accomplice. . . . I was convinced that our erotic relationship was intelligently balanced between tenderness and an essentially monogamous passion, and great flights of fantasy, which never became a form of addiction. . . . As for Jane, she did not allow herself extramarital escapades. This should have opened my eyes.”

He complains that after he and Fonda were finally divorced, she told him she felt demeaned by his indiscretions. The reader of this book may finish it feeling the same way. The French do have a word for Vadim, one that deprives him of the last word, as he had evidently hoped. That word is: gauche .

u/Crazy-Old-Stories — 6 days ago

30 years ago TiME surveys four of the hottest ideas in tech; some of these became a lot bigger than others

TIME magazine Apr. 29, 1996

Techwatch:

SWEET SMELL OF…SILICON?

Convinced that smelling is believing, Arizona-based Ferris Productions Inc. last week unveiled the Experience System, a virtual-reality game station with an olfactory add-on.

A mere $12,000 buys the system: a heat-sensitive chair that contours to the body and simulates zero gravity; a million-pixel, head-mounted display that feeds the eyes, headphones that fill the ears, and a quarter-inch hose that fits under the nose.

Our test-sniff report: though it is relaxing to smell “brine” while virtual scuba diving, the cybertrees in the “forest” begin to hint of Pine-Sol after a few minutes, and a flight though the “atmosphere” leaves a trace of burning tires.

The company promises more smells over the next year. Not on the list, however, are sex-attracting pheromones. Although Ferris co-founder Scott Jochim has had plenty of requests, he worries that each whiff could be “addictive.” Sure, but so is the smell of money.

GHOST IN THE MACHINE

New-media enthusiasts bedeviled by vaporware–products hyped before they exist–should thrill to the rare appearance of its opposite. Call it ghostware: technology that is alive and well today with no one (or almost no one) sensing its presence.

One example of ghostware haunts America’s 3.1 million alphanumeric pagers (a.k.a. alphas), those sleek ’90s icons that deliver, along with the usual phone numbers, written messages such as “Running late” or “Where’s my heroin?” Almost all today’s alphas, unbeknown to their owners, can also receive E-mail. That means Mom can beckon you home by sending a message over CompuServe or your husband can slip an electronic grocery list across the Internet and onto your hip. (If you have a pager, one phone call to your service provider should be enough to turn on the mail.)

The next step is interactivity. Wireless Access, a Silicon Valley start-up, has invented an innovative product called SkyWriter that includes an onscreen keyboard and a thumb-guided cursor for pecking out and transmitting messages. It works: five minutes after a Time reporter first picked one up, he managed to create and send E-mail–while navigating rush-hour traffic. How good is the technology? Three weeks ago, Microsoft shelled out an estimated $25 million to increase its small stake in Skytel, a pager company that will sell the SkyWriter this fall. Bill Gates, it seems, believes in ghosts.

CYBERIAN LANDSCAPES

For this summer’s crop of well-intentioned but clueless souls endeavoring to turn their drab backyards into earthly Edens, the 3D Landscape CD-ROM could be as valuable as seeds or hoes. With this instructional software from Books That Work, budding green thumbs can design their own realistic gardens on an easy-to-use computer grid, dragging and dropping into place any of 800 plants and flowers. Advanced features let users take a 3-D tour of their creations or watch the virtual gardens blossom and fade as the seasons pass. One tip: Don’t add water. (Books That Work, 1-800-242-4546, $59.95)

INTEL OUTSIDE

Even though microchip giant Intel has been living in a world of sunny profits and growth, industry watchers are impressed to see that CEO Andy Grove has been quietly preparing a rainy-day strategy. Aided by some of his top engineers, Grove has invested more than $200 million in glitzy applications like virtual reality and on-screen PC televisions. The reason: these programs make extreme demands on the average computer, prompting feature-hungry users to upgrade to new, extra-fast microprocessors–something Intel happens to make millions of each year. For techies who have gone Pentium, Grove’s bounty should prove a boon: today’s PCs will surely justify the upgrade with Intel-funded gaming and communications programs. A look at three of the best:

INTERCAST: Intel engineers have figured out a way to use the vertical blanking interval–the portion of the TV signal normally reserved for closed captions–to send Net data alongside broadcast video. The result is a scrappy but functional version of interactive TV that lets users browse the Web while watching miniature televisions on their specially equipped PCs. Among the first possible providers: nbc News, which could beam out Web pages with its nightly broadcast. While Tom Brokaw talked about Bosnia, viewers could click their way through a Balkans map or send E-mail to the U.N.

RSX: Intel is another company working to make virtual reality less virtual and more real. Their target: your ears. The RSX system brings nearly CD-quality 3-D sound to Web-based VR. With two stereo speakers, the program can simulate Doppler effects, explosions and even the sound of a circling helicopter that fades from left speaker to right and back again.

PROSHARE: Next week Intel will unveil the newest version of this year-old video-conferencing program. The system, which requires ISDN wiring and (surprise) a Pentium chip, lets scattered users collaborate in a shared online “office.”

–By Daniel Eisenberg, Marty Katz, Michael Krantz and Noah Robischon

reddit.com
u/Crazy-Old-Stories — 6 days ago

50 years ago the mystery of Howard Hughes' will mystery explodes into public - Mormons, a tattered envelope, and the gas station attendant (TIME article)

Howard Hughes died on April 5, 1976, having not been seen in public since 1961. Next week, he was the cover story on both TIME and Newsweek.

TIME had an artist paint the above image of what he must have looked like at the end because he hadn't been photographed since 1954.

One major focus of those articles was the search by police for a will, since he left an estate estimated at $2.3 billion to $2.5 billion (which is roughly $13 billion in today's money). He had not filed a will with any authority or even given a copy to a lawyer.

Then, a few weeks later, events took this bizarre turn...

TYCOONS: The Hughes Will: Is It for Real?

TIME May 10, 1976

Ever since Howard Hughes died in an air ambulance over Texas early last month, a frantic search has been under way to find the will of the reclusive billionaire. Unless a valid last testament is found, Hughes’ vast estate, estimated at $2.3 billion, is certain to become the subject of the largest probate battle of all time. Last week what was said to be Hughes’ will suddenly appeared in Salt Lake City, but the document seemed more likely to cause new legal problems than to resolve the old ones.

Large Scrawl. The circumstances surrounding the will’s discovery were mysterious. As a public relations executive of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (Mormons) was sorting through the mail on his desk one afternoon, he came upon a tattered yellow envelope. The envelope, bearing a partly illegible Las Vegas postmark, was addressed to Spencer W. Kimball, president of the Mormon church. Inside the first envelope was a smaller one that bore instructions written in a large scrawl. They ordered Kimball to deliver the enclosed will to legal authorities in Clark County, Nev., “after my death or disappearance.” It was signed Howard R. Hughes. In a bizarre coincidence, a few hours before the discovery, Texan John Connally turned up at the Mormon offices. Frank W. Gay, the chief executive of Hughes’ Summa Corp. and a devout Mormon, also happened to drop by Salt Lake City just before the will was found. A Mormon spokesman insisted that Connally met with churchmen on an unrelated matter, and Big John branded any connection “a vicious, malicious, irresponsible story.” Gay was in town for a meeting of the University of Utah advisory council.

Inside the envelope, Kimball found a three-page handwritten will on lined legal paper identical to the type Hughes regularly used for memos to his staff. It was dated March 19, 1968, a time when Hughes was living atop the Desert Inn in Las Vegas. There were no witnesses’ signatures. The will assigned one quarter of Hughes’ assets (about $600 million before taxes and executor’s fees) to the Howard Hughes Medical Institute, his tax-free research foundation. One-eighth was to be divided among Houston’s Rice University and the Universities of Texas, Nevada and California. Eight different groups of beneficiaries got one-sixteenth shares (about $150 million each): the Mormon church; William Lummis, a cousin in Houston; and a man named Melvin Dummar, who leases a gas station in Willard, Utah. Hughes’ former wives (Ella Rice and Jean Peters) were to divide a one-sixteenth share. Aside from bequests to the Boy Scouts, an orphans’ home and a school scholarship fund, Hughes’ inner circle of aides stood to collect the rest of the estate, some $450 million.

Mormon church leaders submitted the document to a Utah handwriting expert, Mrs. Leslie King, who had studied Hughes’ handwriting in an earlier court case. After a hurried examination, she declared: “There is a good chance that Mr. Hughes did write that will.” The Mormons then rushed to Las Vegas, the seat of Clark County, to file the testament. “It could be an actual legal document or a hoax,” said Mormon Spokesman Wendell Ashton. “This was a hot potato to land in our office.”

It also may be a bad potato. The handwriting bore a resemblance to Hughes’. But other features of the will seemed highly suspect. Hughes was a nitpicking perfectionist who spelled out everything in exhaustive detail. Yet the purported will contained vague statements (sample: “the remainder [of the estate] is to be divided among the key men in my company’s [sic].” Furthermore, Hughes almost never made spelling errors. Yet the 260-word testament is studded with eleven misspellings, including “cildren” for children and “re-volk” for revoke.

Even more dubious were some of the main features of the will. Melvin Dummar said in interviews that he gave Hughes a lift near Las Vegas in 1968. “I spotted this skinny old man—about 60—alongside the dirt road,” he said. “His face was cut up and bleeding. I thought he was a wino. I asked him how he got hurt, but he never replied. When we got to the [Sands] hotel, he asked me to drive him around the back and asked me for some money. I had quite a bit, but I figured he was a bum so I gave him a quarter.” After learning that his two-bit handout might bring him a 600 millionfold return, Dummar suffered a nervous collapse and at week’s end was heavily sedated under a doctor’s care.

Bitter Falling. Even more implausible was the person named as executor of the will—Noah Dietrich, 87, Hughes’ longtime lieutenant. The two had a bitter falling out in 1956 and never reconciled. Dietrich said last week, “I have no question that it’s his [Hughes’] handwriting and his signature.”

In addition, lawyers who worked for Hughes found it inconceivable that he would have relied on a handwritten last testament. He had a deep fear that his handwriting could be forged and even tried to keep his signature secret.

Lawyers and professional investigators continued to press a nationwide search for an authentic will. The best clues so far: a key to a safe-deposit box found among Hughes’ belongings in his old Romaine Street office in Hollywood and a 1938 registered letter to the First National Bank in Houston saying he was enclosing a will. Neither discovery has produced results. America’s—perhaps the world’s—foremost mystery man in life, Howard Hughes may have created his biggest mystery in death.

u/Crazy-Old-Stories — 6 days ago

Cybil Shepherd goes on Letterman wearing only a towel (& shoes), 40 years ago May 7/8

Crazy Letterman #5

Moonlighting, which was the critical darling at the time, was about to air its famous season 2 finale a week after this.

u/Crazy-Old-Stories — 7 days ago

Rupert Murdoch announces his new network, the Fox channel, will begin with a talk show hosted by Joan Rivers (40 years ago - this will lead to both big success and tragedy)

If you're too young to remember, this was the start of the breakup of teh monopoly of the "Big Three" (ABC, NBC, and CBS).

There had not been a fourth broadcast network for over 30 years, when the Dumont network collapsed.

Rupert Murdoch, who was basically a press baron, decided he wanted to get into the American tv game so he started with a billion-dollar shopping spree in 1985. Murdoch bought the Metromedia station group, he bought 20th Century Fox studios (and decided to name the network after that), but he faced a the big problem that had always prevented a fourth network. He had no pipe to get his shows into people’s homes. A network had to get local affiliate stations to carry the networks's programming (as opposed to to just filling their channel with old movies, reruns, and local shows), and the affiliates who wanted to work with a network were already committed to the big three.

So Murdoch decided he would start with a single program that would be a kind of wedge. He could get affiliate stations to give up one hour a night, and then once they got used to this he would try to sell them on a slate of prime time shows (I think only a few nights of the week).

Remember, at this time there was only one late night show: Carson's Tonight Show. So it looked like room for competition.

[As the article points out, the last attempt to run a competing show was made by a Comedien song-and-joke man Alan Thicke, who flopped dismally, but who would get a job playing the dad on a new show called Growing Pains around the same time Joan's show started in the fall.]

Who should host it? Since Carson had lots and lots of guests filling in for him (he joked about it himself), it made sense to raid his guest host roster for talent, and the most popular seemed to be Joan Rivers. As it happened, Joan Rivers was ticked off at NBC because they wouldn't consider her as a possible replacement for Carson whenever he should decide to retire.

Joan signed the deal with Fox, but she didn't announce it right away because - as she herself told the story - she had another hosting gig on the Tonight Show in April and didn't want it to get cancelled. Carson read about it when news articles like this one came out in the papers. He never forgave her for it, and she never forgave him for not forgiving her.

Because Fox had to sign up independent stations, a lot of them were on the UHF band (channels 14 and up). In 1986, these often had fuzzy reception and required those circular "loop" antennas. People literally had to struggle to watch the birth of the 4th network.

In my area, it was channel 12, not UHF, and it carried The Late Show and later some of the prime time shows, but dropped all of it after a couple of years and went back to showing old movies.

Fox had 'big success' but not for years. Fox didn't really have a killer hit until the Simpsons. When the Simpsons went on the air, so many parts of the country didn't have a Fox station that there was a whole bootleg tape culture around the show: you would ask you relatives in another state to tape it and send it to you, and you'd circulate it to friends.

The tragedy involved Joan's husband but that's another story.

u/Crazy-Old-Stories — 8 days ago
▲ 115 r/Crazy_retro_stories+1 crossposts

30 years ago, TIME gets an exclusive interview with the mysterious new terrorist Osama Bin Ladin

OSAMA BIN LADEN: THE PALADIN OF JIHAD

May 5, 1996

Osama bin Laden is a hard man to find. An exile from Saudi Arabia, he has lived in Sudan for five years, but he is a recluse, and his whereabouts are known only to his aides and a handful of Sudanese officials. To arrange to see him, I first had to track down one of bin Laden’s associates in London. Then, at a tearoom near Charing Cross Station, I made a request for a meeting. Several weeks later, bin Laden sent encouragement. I traveled to Khartoum, and waited for a few days at a hotel when a message came through the front desk, “The businessman will see you.”

A Toyota with black-tinted windows picked me up and drove me through Khartoum. Finally, after arriving at a building on the outskirts of the city, I was shown into a cramped office where several bodyguards stood watchfully. Tall, barefoot, smiling broadly, bin Laden greeted me in a gold-trimmed robe and red-checkered headdress. With an exaggerated gesture of his arms, he offered a cushion as a seat. Depending on who is to be believed, this gracious hospitality came from either a devout Muslim businessman, as bin Laden would claim, or “one of the most significant financial sponsors of Islamic extremist activities in the world today,” as the U.S. State Department describes him.

The U.S. has a special interest in bin Laden because of the bombing that occurred last November at an American-run National Guard training center in Riyadh, Saudi Arabia. Seven people were killed, including five Americans. Last week, Saudi television broadcast the confessions of four men arrested in the bombing, and they said they had been influenced by faxes sent from bin Laden’s Advice and Reformation Committee. U.S. officials investigating the bombing believe bin Laden’s involvement may have gone further, and one says he is “high on our suspect list.”

Although virtually unknown in the West, bin Laden is a towering figure among Islamic fundamentalists. His late father rose from peasant origins in Yemen to become Saudi Arabia’s richest construction magnate. The family’s wealth is estimated at $5 billion, and at 38, Osama bin Laden personally controls a fortune of perhaps $300 million. In the 1980s he became famous in Islamic circles for his heroic role fighting the Soviets in Afghanistan as one of the main leaders of the Arab volunteers. A few years after the war, he went into exile in Sudan, where he runs several businesses–a construction firm, a farm that produces sunflower seeds, a tannery that exports goat hides to Italy.

But his resume doesn’t end there. Bin Laden has become prominent in the embryonic Islamic movement aimed at toppling the pro-Western monarchy in Saudi Arabia. Moreover, security officials in Saudi Arabia and the U.S. suspect that he has become a central participant in a loose network that provides funds for Islamic terrorists. Rather than depending solely on states like Sudan, Iran or Libya, this group’s jihad is being coordinated and underwritten by individuals as well. In addition to making his own financial contributions, bin Laden plays another role, several sources believe: he raises money from Islamic businessmen, mainly in the Gulf, runs it through companies in the U.S., Europe and the Middle East and eventually funnels it to holy warriors in various countries. “There was a time when people thought that any support for international terrorism must be state-centered,” says a scholar in London. “The bin Laden phenomenon is an illustration of the privatization of the support of terrorism.”

At his office near Khartoum, bin Laden acknowledges his political opposition to the House of Saud, but belittles the terrorism charges. During the long conversation–interrupted twice for prayers–he explained the accusations against him by saying, “The Egyptians would catch somebody who would say, ‘I was trained in bin Laden’s camp.’ These camps were set up to help the Afghans, but suddenly the Egyptian media is blaming me for anything that happens. It’s like blaming a university for students who graduate and go perform bad deeds.”

So far no one has produced conclusive evidence of bin Laden’s involvement with terrorism. Nevertheless, investigators are tracking him closely. Sources in the West and Middle East have told TIME the following:

–Last December, British police raided the London residence of an Algerian named Rachid Ramda and found communications from the Armed Islamic Group, an Algerian organization suspected in seven bombings in France that killed seven and wounded 180 last year. The police also discovered records of wire-fund transfers and traced them to bin Laden’s headquarters in Khartoum.

–Also in December, Egyptian security officials uncovered a conspiracy by the extremist group Islamic Jihad to assassinate President Hosni Mubarak. Based on interrogations, which may have included torture, Egyptian authorities are now investigating an informant’s tip that bin Laden helped fund the plot.

–Relying on confessions by suspected terrorists, Egyptian security officials also allege that bin Laden is the major financier of a camp in Afghanistan called Kunar that provides training for recruits of Islamic Jihad and the Islamic Group, both Egyptian terrorist organizations.

–Citing its own intelligence sources, the U.S. State Department claims that bin Laden helps fund three terrorist training camps in northern Sudan. Extremists from Egypt, Algeria and Tunisia receive instruction at the camps.

–In 1992 two hotel bombs in Aden killed two Austrian tourists and narrowly missed 100 U.S. servicemen en route to Somalia for Operation Restore Hope. The U.S. State Department says bin Laden was implicated by suspects as the bankroller behind both bombings.

Growing up in Saudi Arabia near the Red Sea, bin Laden struck those around him as an ordinary young man. But he was more pious than his brothers, and was deeply affected by the involvement of his family’s company in rebuilding the holy mosques in Mecca and Medina. Then in 1979, just after he graduated from King Abdul Aziz University, the Soviet Union invaded Afghanistan, and mujahedin resistance fighters put out an international plea for help. Bin Laden responded by packing himself and several of his family’s bulldozers off to central Asia. He was inspired, he said, by the plight of Muslims in a medieval society besieged by a 20th century superpower. “In our religion, there is a special place in the hereafter for those who participate in jihad,” he told TIME. “One day in Afghanistan was like 1,000 days of praying in an ordinary mosque.”

At first his work was political. He recruited thousands of Arab fighters in the Gulf, paid for their passage to Afghanistan and set up the main guerrilla camp to train them. Later he designed and constructed defensive tunnels and ditches along the Pakistani border, driving a bulldozer and exposing himself to strafing from Soviet helicopter gunships. Before long, he had taken up a Kalashnikov and was going into battle. In 1986 he and a few dozen Arab defenders fought off a Soviet onslaught in a town called Jaji, not far from the Pakistani border. To Arabs, it was one of the first demonstrations that the Russians could actually be beaten. A year later, bin Laden led an offensive against Soviet troops in the battle of Shaban. Vicious hand-to-hand fighting claimed heavy mujahedin casualties, but his men succeeded in pushing the Soviets out of the area.

“He was a hero to us because he was always on the front line, always moving ahead of everybody else,” recalls Hamza Mohammed, a Palestinian volunteer in Afghanistan who now manages one of bin Laden’s construction projects in Sudan. “He not only gave his money, but he also gave himself. He came down from his palace to live with the Afghan peasants and the Arab fighters. He cooked with them, ate with them, dug trenches with them. That was bin Laden’s way.”

Bin Laden returned home to discover that he had become a celebrity. But his star appeal swiftly faded when he began denouncing the Saudi regime. The government had already come under criticism from Muslim activists for its corruption and its failure to adhere strictly to Islamic law. All these failings offended bin Laden. But the real apostasy was King Fahd’s decision to allow Western troops into the kingdom during the Gulf War. In bin Laden’s view, armed infidels in the holy land were a desecration of Islam. After publicly criticizing the regime and becoming the target of a harassment campaign, he fled to Sudan in 1991. A sizable contingent of “Afghan Arabs”–Arabs from various countries who fought in Afghanistan–followed him and found work with his companies.

Now bin Laden runs his farms and his businesses in Sudan, criticizes the Saudi government from afar, and, he says, gives money for charities. He suggested a second meeting, this time at his small, walled farm on the bank of the Blue Nile south of Khartoum. At the farm, he made a point of claiming that the Egyptians had cited it as a terrorist camp. All that could be seen were a few horses, cows and goats. “Take pictures of whatever you like,” bin Laden said with a smile.

Sitting cross-legged on the ground next to the stables, he refused to speak about a number of issues, including his exact links with the governments of Sudan and Iran or with convicted terrorists like Egyptian Sheikh Omar Abdul Rahman, now in a U.S. prison. However, he disavowed any involvement in the Riyadh bombing and the recent suicide attacks in Israel. “It is no surprise to me that corrupt regimes would make such charges,” he says.

Despite his denials, bin Laden remains a grave concern to those “corrupt regimes.” He is, as a U.S. official said, a “big fish,” since his heroic reputation gives him influence. According to this official, “Bin Laden is the kind of guy who can go to someone and say, ‘I need you to write out a six-figure check,’ and he gets it on the spot. He hits up Islamic businessmen who in some cases may not know where their money is going. A lot of it isn’t going to rebuild mosques in Bosnia or feed starving Muslims in Somalia. A lot of it is going to set up camps and support networks and procure material for terrorist operations.”

The Saudi government has stripped bin Laden of his citizenship, Britain has forbidden him to enter the country, the U.S. has made serious allegations against him, but so far no one has charged him with any crime. In his conversations with TIME, he gave a warning to those who would continue to pursue him. “People are supposed to be innocent until proved guilty,” he said. “Well, not the Afghan fighters. They are the ‘terrorists of the world.’ But pushing them against the wall will do nothing, except increase the terrorism.”

–Scott Macleod; With reporting by Dean Fischer/Washington and Helen Gibson/London

 

u/Crazy-Old-Stories — 8 days ago

By Mary McCarthy

Feb. 9, 1986.

THE HANDMAID'S TALE By Margaret Atwood. 311 pp. Boston: Houghton Mifflin Company. $16.95.

SURELY the essential element of a cautionary tale is recognition. Surprised recognition, even, enough to administer a shock. We are warned, by seeing our present selves in a distorting mirror, of what we may be turning into if current trends are allowed to continue. That was the effect of ''Nineteen Eighty-Four,'' with its scary dating, not 40 years ahead, maybe also of ''Brave New World'' and, to some extent, of ''A Clockwork Orange.''

It is an effect, for me, almost strikingly missing from Margaret Atwood's very readable book ''The Handmaid's Tale,'' offered by the publisher as a ''forecast'' of what we may have in store for us in the quite near future. A standoff will have been achieved vis-a-vis the Russians, and our own country will be ruled by right-wingers and religious fundamentalists, with males restored to the traditional role of warriors and us females to our ''place'' - which, however, will have undergone subdivision into separate sectors, of wives, breeders, servants and so forth, each clothed in the appropriate uniform. A fresh postfeminist approach to future shock, you might say. Yet the book just does not tell me what there is in our present mores that I ought to watch out for unless I want the United States of America to become a slave state something like the Republic of Gilead whose outlines are here sketched out.

Another reader, less peculiar than myself, might confess to a touch of apathy regarding credit cards (instruments of social control), but I have always been firmly against them and will go to almost any length to avoid using one. Yet I can admit to a general failure to extrapolate sufficiently from the 1986 scene. Still, even when I try, in the light of these palely lurid pages, to take the Moral Majority seriously, no shiver of recognition ensues. I just can't see the intolerance of the far right, presently directed not only at abortion clinics and homosexuals but also at high school libraries and small-town schoolteachers, as leading to a super-biblical puritanism by which procreation will be insisted on and reading of any kind banned. Nor, on the other hand, do I fear our ''excesses'' of tolerance as pointing in the same direction. Liberality toward pornography in the courts, the media, on the newstands may make an anxious parent feel disgusted with liberalism, but can it really move a nation to install a theocracy strictly based on the Book of Genesis? Where are the signs of it? A backlash is only a backlash, that is, a reaction. Fear of a backlash, in politics, ought not to deter anybody from adhering to principle; that would be only another form of cowardice.

The same for ''excessive'' feminism, which here seems to bear some responsibility for Gilead, to be one of its causes. The kind of doctrinaire feminism likely to produce a backlash is exemplified in the narrator's absurd mother, whom we first hear of at a book-burning in the old, pre-Gilead time - the ''right'' kind of book-burning, naturally, merely a pyre of pornographic magazines: ''Mother,'' thinks the narrator in what has become the present, ''You wanted a women's culture. Well, now there is one.'' The wrong kind, of course.

The new world of ''The Handmaid's Tale'' is a woman's world, even though governed, seemingly, and policed by men. Its ethos is entirely domestic, its female population is divided into classes based on household functions, each class clad in a separate color that instantly identifies the wearer - dull green for the Marthas (houseworkers); blue for the Wives; red, blue and green stripes for the Econowives (working class); red for the Handmaids (whose function is to bear children to the head of the household, like Bilhah, Rachel's handmaid in Genesis, but who also, in their long red gowns and white wimple-like headgear, have something of the aura of a temple harlot); brown for the Aunts (a thought-control force, part-governess, part-reform-school matron). The head of the household - whose first name the handmaid takes, adding the word ''of'' to show possession -''Offred,'' ''Ofwarren'' - is known as the Commander. It is his duty to inseminate his assigned partner, who lies on the spread thighs of his wife. THE Commanders, presumably, are the high bureaucracy of the regime, yet they are oddly powerless in the household, having no part in the administration of discipline and ceremonially subject to their aging wives. We are not told how and in what sense they govern. The oversight perhaps accounts for the thin credibility of the parable. That they lack freedom, are locked into their own rigid system, is only to be expected. It is no surprise that our narrator's commander, Fred, like a typical bourgeois husband of former times, does a bit of cheating, getting Offred to play Scrabble with him secretly at night (where books are forbidden, word games become wicked), look at his hoard of old fashion magazines (forbidden), kiss him, even go dressed in glitter and feathers to an underground bunny-type nightclub staffed by fallen women, mostly lesbian. Nor is it a surprise that his wife catches him/ them. Plusca change, plus c'est la meme chose. But that cannot be the motto for a cautionary tale, whose job is to warn of change.

Infertility is the big problem of the new world and the reason for many of its institutions. A dramatically lowered birth rate, which brought on the fall of the old order, had a plurality of causes, we are told. ''The air got too full, once, of chemicals, rays, radiation, the water swarmed with toxic molecules.'' During an earthquake, atomic power plants exploded (''nobody's fault''). A mutant strain of syphilis appeared, and of course AIDS. Then there were women who refused to breed, as an antinuclear protest, and had their tubes tied up. Anyway, infertility, despite the radical measures of the new regime, has not yet been overcome. Not only are there barren women (mostly shipped to the colonies) but a worrying sterility in men, especially among the powerful who ought to be reproducing themselves. The amusing suggestion is made, late in the book at a symposium (June 25, 2195) of Gileadean historical studies, that sterility among the Commanders may have been the result of an earlier gene-splicing experiment with mumps that produced a virus intended for insertion into the supply of caviar used by top officials in Moscow.

''The Handmaid's Tale'' contains several such touches of deft sardonic humor - for example, the television news program showing clouds of smoke over what was formerly the city of Detroit: we hear the anchorman explain that resettlement of the children of Ham in National Homeland One (the wilds of North Dakota) is continuing on schedule - 3,000 have arrived that week. And yet what is lacking, I think - what constitutes a fundamental disappointment after a promising start - is the destructive force of satire. ''Nineteen Eighty-Four'' had it, ''A Clockwork Orange'' had it, even ''Brave New World'' had it, though Huxley was rather short on savagery. If ''The Handmaid's Tale'' doesn't scare one, doesn't wake one up, it must be because it has no satiric bite.

The author has carefully drawn her projections from current trends. As she has said elsewhere, there is nothing here that has not been anticipated in the United States of America that we already know. Perhaps that is the trouble: the projections are too neatly penciled in. The details, including a Wall (as in Berlin, but also, as in the Middle Ages, a place where executed malefactors are displayed), all raise their hands announcing themselves present. At the same time, the Republic of Gilead itself, whatever in it that is not a projection, is insufficiently imagined. The Aunts are a good invention, though I cannot picture them as belonging to any future; unlike Big Brother, they are more part of the past - our schoolteachers.

But the most conspicuous lack, in comparison with the classics of the fearsome-future genre, is the inability to imagine a language to match the changed face of common life. No newspeak. And nothing like the linguistic tour de force of ''A Clockwork Orange'' - the brutal melting-down of current English and Slavic words that in itself tells the story of the dread new breed. The writing of ''The Handmaid's Tale'' is undistinguished in a double sense, ordinary if not glaringly so, but also indistinguishable from what one supposes would be Margaret Atwood's normal way of expressing herself in the circumstances. This is a serious defect, unpardonable maybe for the genre: a future that has no language invented for it lacks a personality. That must be why, collectively, it is powerless to scare. ONE could argue that the very tameness of the narrator-heroine's style is intended as characterization. It is true that a leading trait of Offred (we are never told her own, real name in so many words, but my textual detective work says it is June) has always been an unwillingness to stick her neck out, and perhaps we are meant to conclude that such unwillingness, multiplied, may be fatal to a free society. After the takeover, she tells us, there were some protests and demonstrations. ''I didn't go on any of the marches. Luke [ her husband ] said it would be futile, and I had to think about them, my family, him and her [ their little girl ] .'' Famous last words. But, though this may characterize an attitude - fairly widespread - it does not constitute a particular kind of speech. And there are many poetical passages, for example (chosen at random): ''All things white and circular. I wait for the day to unroll, for the earth to turn, according to the round face of the implacable clock.'' Which is surely oldspeak, wouldn't you say?

Characterization in general is weak in ''The Handmaid's Tale,'' which maybe makes it a poet's novel. I cannot tell Luke, the husband, from Nick, the chauffeur-lover who may be an Eye (government spy) and/ or belong to the ''Mayday'' underground. Nor is the Commander strongly drawn. Again, the Aunts are best. How sad for postfeminists that one does not feel for Offred-June half as much as one did for Winston Smith, no hero either but at any rate imaginable. It seems harsh to say again of a poet's novel - so hard to put down, in part so striking - that it lacks imagination, but that, I fear, is the problem.

The Lady Was Not for Hanging

The dedication of ''The Handmaid's Tale'' -''For Mary Webster and Perry Miller'' - holds clues to the novel's roots in our Puritan past. ''Mary Webster was an ancestor of mine who was hanged for a witch in Connecticut,'' Margaret Atwood explained. ''But she didn't die. They hadn't invented the drop yet'' - the part of the platform that falls away - ''so they hanged her but she lived.'' The author's studies in early American history under the Harvard scholar Perry Miller also informs her theme of religious intolerance. ''You often hear in North America, 'It can't happen here,' but it happened quite early on. The Puritans banished people who didn't agree with them, so we would be rather smug to assume that the seeds are not there. That's why I set the book in Cambridge,'' said the Canadian author, who lives in Toronto and has traveled widely in the United States. Like many of her fictional women (she has written poems, essays and novels, notably the feminist classic ''Surfacing''), she is wryly unpolemical. ''Feminist activity is not causal, it's symptomatic,'' she said of the book's antiwoman society. ''Any power structure will co-opt the views of its opponents, to sugarcoat the pill. The regime gives women some things the women's movement says they want -control over birth, no pornography - but there's a price. If you were going to put in a repressive regime, how would you do it?'' Despite the novel's projections from current events, Margaret Atwood resists calling her book a warning. ''I do not have a political agenda of that kind. The book won't tell you who to vote for,'' she said. But she advises, ''Anyone who wants power will try to manipulate you by appealing to your desires and fears, and sometimes your best instincts. Women have to be a little cautious about that kind of appeal to them. What are we being asked to give up?'' - Caryn James

---'

Mary McCarthy, whose latest book is ''Occasional Prose,'' will assume the new Stevenson Chair of Literature at Bard College beginning this fall.

reddit.com
u/Crazy-Old-Stories — 9 days ago

Youth: Teen-Age Marriage

TIME APRIL 29, 1966

You got that feel, learning good, You’re ready now, girl, You’re ready now.

Or so lots of the teen-age hippies swinging to Franky Valley’s rock-‘n’-roll hit think. Last week a group of psychologists and educators gathered at the San Francisco Medical Center to discuss how teen-age marriages fare. The background statistics were chilling in themselves: 40% of today’s brides are between the ages of 15 and 18; within five years, half of teen-age marriages end in divorce.

Why do teen-agers get married? And what goes wrong? Pennsylvania State University Professor Carlfred Broderick sees it beginning when they decide to go steady (more than half do), terms this “the beginning of the end.” Says Broderick: “It takes little or no effort to get more and more involved; before they know it, they are slipping and sliding into marriage.” For boys, sex is the driving force (at least 35% of teenage brides are pregnant when they marry); the stronger the moral code, the more likely that the teen-ager will marry early.

For girls, as important as sex is the desire to “love.” But an early expectation of romance can soon be replaced by harsh reality. Disillusion is especially rapid when the husband has to curtail his education or children arrive too early.

The teen-age marrieds present on the panel tended to agree that escape into early marriage is risky at best. One part-time secretary who was born illegitimate herself confessed she had yearned for security. A pretty cocktail waitress who was wed at 17 said, “I was marrying to get out of home.” Bitterest of all was a girl who married at 17, is now in the process of getting divorced. “My parents trusted me too much,” she said. “In a way, it’s too bad giving kids too much time for things they’re not ready for.” For her, the future is bleak. Said she: “I have a little boy of two and a little boy of four, and they’re too much for me. I’m not grown up yet.”

What would the teen-age marrieds advise their own children to do? Said a 19-year-old motorcycle enthusiast who had to sidetrack a law career and go to work in a cement plant when he found his wife-to-be was pregnant: “I don’t think it’s a good idea for young people to get married; there are too many things to do then. But it’s so hard for a teen-ager to say, This is my judgment,’ when in your own experience you don’t know what you’ve done until it was done.”

reddit.com
u/Crazy-Old-Stories — 10 days ago

TIME, May 3, 1976

The High Cost of Learning

Terrel H. Bell, 54, had a problem familiar to many Americans: even with a handsome salary ($37,800), he was not going to be able to put all his children through college. Bell’s eldest son will enter the University of Utah in September (room, board and tuition: $2,700); two other sons will soon follow.

With that in mind, Bell candidly wrote his boss, Health, Education and Welfare Secretary David Matthews, that even with just one son in college, there was “no way I can support him from my present position.” And so Terrel Bell submitted his resignation, effective Aug. 1, as U.S. Commissioner of Education.

He will become Utah’s commissioner of higher education and head of its board of regents—at a salary of $48,600.

An F in History

At Public School 161 in Manhattan, three-fourths of the students are Hispanic. So the community school board decided to rechristen the school, which bore the name of Fiorello H. LaGuardia. As a three-term mayor, the “Little Flower” championed city dwellers of every race and creed. But no matter; he was Italian, not Hispanic. The board thereupon chose the name of Pedro Albizu Campos, who before his death in 1965 proved his “unselfish devotion,” in the board’s words, “to the cause of liberation of Puerto Rico from the yoke of American colonialism.”

As it happens, only about 4% of Puerto Rico’s voters in the 1972 elections seemed to want liberation.

As it also happens, Albizu had waged a lifelong terrorist campaign. He instigated the 1950 assassination attempt against Harry Truman and in 1954, after four of his followers sprayed gunfire around the House of Representatives, wounding five Congressmen, hailed the triggermen for “sublime heroism.”

Some New Yorkers protested. The only Puerto Rican in the House of Representatives, Bronx Congressman Herman Badillo, suggested that the board could “find more impressive people than Mr. Albizu, who supported violence and overthrow of governments.” Asked LaGuardia’s widow, Marie: “Can they do that?” At week’s end the board was standing by its eccentric decision.

Power Switch Hitters

Weighing the case of a Justice Department worker who had been fired for spurning the sexual advances of her boss, U.S. District Court Judge Charles R. Richey last week tried to apply some firm rules of law to such indelicate situations. He came close to succeeding, then fell on his face. From his Washington courtroom, Richey decreed that under Title VII of the 1964 Civil Rights Act, employees discharged for not submitting to amorous advances may bring sexual-discrimination charges against the following bosses: 1) males who try to seduce female subordinates, 2) females who make advances toward male underlings and 3) homosexuals who have eyes for employees of the same gender.

Unaccountably, Richey then left a loophole big enough to destroy all the above rules. He decided that bisexual bosses are free to impose themselves on whomever they like—presumably on the ground that they would not discriminate against workers of either sex.

reddit.com
u/Crazy-Old-Stories — 11 days ago

Life's a Scream with Sam Kinison

SPIN, May 1986

 

Everybody loves impressions, right? Right? Here's my Rodney Dangerfield anyway:.”

"l don't get no respect. No respect at all.”

No good? How about this Steve Martin?.”

"Well, excuuuuuse me!".”

Okay, I'm sorry. Steven Wright,.”

"It's a small world, but I wouldn't want to have to paint it.”

Last year's model. But hold it, check out this Sam Kinison person: "AAAAAAAGGHHHHHHH!!".”

There you have it: The Scream. And kids, don't try this at home—it's a tough one to mimic. David Letterman tried it recently when Kinison was on Late Night, but he just couldn't capture the horror embodied in the demonic 32-year-old comedian's angst-ridden, guttural bellow from the depths of hell. He's obviously getting ready to get used to it, though, and so should you, because singles bars the world over may soon ring with that therapeutic primal scraw. In addition to his Letterman spots (hey, Dave even panels the maniac), Kinison is featured monthly on Saturday Night Live and has snagged a juicy bit part in John Landis's upcoming comedy western, Three Amigos (which stars Steve Martin, Martin Short, and Chevy Chase). To top it off, the Los Angeles Comedy Store vet also recently made a successful debut at Manhattan's own casbah Of comedy, Caroline's. From such moves a career in comedy is constructed.

Kinison is a member of that loose group of comedic new-breeders who have relegated material about mothers-in-law and crab grass to the Eddie Cantor comedy archives. These guys "do comedy" that is mainly about comedy. Of course they still tell jokes (relationships, current events, and drugs have replaced wives and alcohol as catch topics), but the work of such as Jay Leno, Steve Wright, Emo Phillips, and even spiritual leader Robin Williams displays irony über alles.

With Kinison, another important influence must be added to the standard roster: religion. His parents were ministers, and the stout maniac was himself a nondenominational preacher for seven years in Tulsa, Oklahoma. "l guess my main comedy influences are Jesus, rock 'n' roll, and ex-wives," he says. "In that order." His stage act—punctuated at regular intervals by The Scream—wallops chuckle-seekers upside the humor control center with the comedy equivalent of Motorhead and Edvard Munch rolled into one. Indeed, blasphemy and the veneer of misogyny ("I know what turns Mr. Hand into Mr. Fist") are offered as well, but when asked, Kinison without hesitation offers this simple job description: "spiritual adviser." Unlike other great comedic ironists of our era, he considers himself truth-teller par excellence.

So give with the truth about The Scream, Sam.

"I was driving to a Los Angeles club, and my girlfriend and I were having a fight. You know how you get so mad you just want to hit something? I think: I'll just give the windshield a pop. I didn't expect to crack the fucking thing all the way across. It made me even madder because now it was going to be another 200 bucks on top of this fucking ridiculous argument. So I get there, go right on stage, and I look down—still trying to fight this fucking rage--—and there's this kid who's gotta 21 or 22 with a beaming little I'venever-been-fucked-over-in-my-life face. So off the cuff I said, 'Are you married?' 'No.' 'l didn't think so. But if you ever consider it, remember this face.' I just took it out on this kid, his hair flew back and he had to check his face for burns. It was just like jet fuel. And it became a trademark.”

The Scream. A trademark. A hook. Something to separate a comic from his herd. Something to get on everybody's nerves after a while. Something a comedian might end up carrying around for the rest of his career. Man, it must get old. But for Sam Kinison, The Scream is his cross to bear, the truth that must be transformed.

"The Bible put it the best way: The truth shall make you free. The truth is like that; it makes you, it changes you. You don't have any choice about it.".

But mightn't the truth have created a monster?.”

"It's hard not to ham The Scream up now that everybody's into it. But I couldn't have created a worse fuckin' logo for myself. I told Robin Williams, 'l never want to hear you bitch about "nanoo-nanoo" again, 0K?' People come up to me on the street and go 'AAAAAAGGHHHHHHH!' It's like being E T. People say, 'He's over here! 'AAAAAACCHHHHHHH!' I try to get away from it, but it's like having packs of rabid dogs after you. I should have just created a logo where somebody comes up and throws a glass of water on me.”

In another sense, Kinison is the comedy equivalent of Philip Glass. A comedy minimalist, he's like the strange savant on the next bar stool who juggles a relatively small number of themes, only with the timing of, well, a professional comic, until a kind of catharsis is reached. Marriage, Jesus, heaven/hell, political nihilism—all interrupted at regular intervals by you-know-what.

Other hints as to just what exactly motivates the stout, secularized comedian are suggested. Kinison defines hell as "being trapped in a relationship with someone you don't love, without the courage to tell them; you end up sleeping a lot," while heaven is "that magical time when you're just falling in love and nothing else matters but each other." Another major influence, not so strangely enough, is David Janssen as "The Fugitive": "Every week William Conrad would come on and say, 'How long can the search for truth go on before the search destroys the man? ' " Love on the run—it's always a scream.

—Richard Gehr

u/Crazy-Old-Stories — 12 days ago