Marie has always been an outcast, she doesn't conform to any of those rules she calls "Stupido," dresses however she wants, but always wears her little pin with a happy face and speaks and expresses herself as she pleases. But above all, there's her laughter, that laughter that can wake any man from a deep coma, that laughter that can be likened to the sound of a duck being strangled, and she's not afraid to show it, because that's what she considers real laughter.
"The strangest laughs are the most authentic, because they come from the heart and reflect a person's true happiness," as she often says.
Except that Marie isn't stupid, and at school, that kind of thing is absolutely unacceptable. She doesn't want to be the outcast, the friendless one, or the one who gets bullied, so she abstains, but all the while maintaining her authentic and rebellious side. Despite her abstention, this has created many problems and enemies for her, but above all, mockery, rumors, and nicknames like "the autistic one" or "the walking opium popper." But she doesn't care about any of that because she has a plan: to reach the end of high school so she can finally let loose and live. Being judged by strangers is, for her, utterly pointless and without real consequence; she loses nothing and, on the contrary, lives happily.
And this plan, well, it worked.
Now she is more than happy; she is herself, without fear. She sings, dances, and skips around in public whenever she wants. And her precious laughter is still there. Although looks of embarrassment or judgment are often directed at her, since she doesn't know them and probably never will, she couldn't care less. These people can't hurt her.
“While they’re miserable and seek approval from others to do whatever they want, I do what I like and live,” she often thinks.
But the world isn’t all bad, and during her free adult life, Marie meets some really nice people.
The chef of the town’s Italian restaurant even says that “Her laughter is as contagious as her joy.” Without a doubt, Marie is happy to live authentically, and while this might seem “strange” to some, it remains a testament to courage for others.
However, Marie doesn’t have any close friends; she just graduated from high school and hasn’t had time to build strong relationships yet, especially since it’s difficult to do so when no one reaches out to her. But everything changed on Tuesday, September 23rd at 1:46 PM. The sky was sunny, the wind was strong enough to send hats flying, the air was fresh, and stomachs were rumbling. In the café "Le Comptoir Gourmand," the aroma of a delicious bacon, egg, and cheese sandwich wafted through the air, and Marie sat alone, just waiting to devour it. In the background, people could be heard discussing various topics, mostly gossip. However, sitting alone in a corner of the café, Martin, a rather ordinary-looking man in a blue tie and black suit, with square glasses and an innocent yet shy expression, couldn't help but glance in Marie's direction. In her, he saw what he had always wanted to be: the audacity and courage to be himself. He didn't judge her but admired her. It was while looking at her that he mustered his courage and tried to approach her. But of course, it wasn't so easy; every time he dared to get up, he magically found a reason not to.
Oh! But I can't let my coffee get cold!
But what am I saying? I've already finished my coffee!
What if the waitress thinks I ran off without paying?
The restaurant is small; she'll surely see me.
What if she doesn't want to talk to anyone?
With that cheerful and welcoming face, surely not!
What if she's waiting for someone?
It's certainly very polite to eat a sandwich first.
Speaking of the sandwich, it looks delicious. Which one is it? ... Bacon, egg, cheese! Of course! That sandwich is divine! You could say she knows her stuff.
With all that back and forth, Martin definitely looked like a fool, but he was so lost in thought that he didn't even notice.
Okay, that's enough, get up and go talk to her, stop whining, you're 20 years old, for God's sake, grow up for once.
What if...? NO!
Immediately, Martin took to his heels and stood up from his chair, determined to talk to Marie.
During those few steps, millions of scenarios played out in his head, including one that suggested she was actually a vampire.
Yes, that was really a scenario he considered.
He quickly realized the absurdity of his thoughts and just went for it.
Finally arriving at Marie's table, Martin was in a panic, his hands sweating, his heart pounding, the air thickening, his thoughts clouded, his eyes unsure where to look. He stammered a few words, which he nevertheless took the time to rehearse:
"Uhh... Hello, I'm Martin... uh... Nice to meet you..." Marie was confused; she wasn't used to anyone approaching her. She even thought he was a beggar or someone asking for a favor.
"Uh... hi?"
Marie's curt and disoriented tone did nothing to calm the atmosphere, but he'd already started, so what the hell, Martin continued.
"So, actually, uh... I was watching you sitting over there. But not in a perverse way, no. It's just that I'd like to get to know you. That's all."
Immediately, Marie's face relaxed, but she was still in shock. This was all new, and she was rather amazed. She looked at this strange man in front of her and admired him.
"Ah! I'm Marie, pleased to meet you! Come sit down!"
The awkwardness had almost disappeared, and now the two were chatting about anything and everything. Martin felt strangely more at ease and happy; he felt free. They mostly talked about the bacon, egg, and cheese sandwich, which blows all other sandwiches out of the water. They talked for hours. Despite their completely opposite personalities, they still managed to find common ground, like their culinary expertise or their passion for tennis. They started debating who would beat the other in a match. At this point, the awkwardness had completely disappeared; they were both happy about this encounter. Marie felt like herself again, because that was what Martin admired about her. Finally, after so many years, she had found the perfect person. Yet, out of fear, she still held back. Despite being bold and true to herself, with every move or word she wondered if it was too much, and she monitored his every gesture. But as the conversation unfolded, looking at him, she noticed that his eyes reflected not a trace of judgment, and she felt increasingly relieved and happy. The date ended on a positive note, and each went home, but kept the other's phone number. Not even a day had passed, and both felt a void. For Martin, it was as if he had returned to normal; that vibrant side of himself he had felt yesterday had completely vanished, and now he was nothing. While Marie missed that feeling of being truly loved, she longed to return to that lunch where she felt appreciated by someone. They were truly lovers. Immediately, they called each other to arrange a second date.
For a change, this date was at a different restaurant, one neither of them had ever tried before, and, lacking any sense of adventure, the place only served terrible sandwiches. Martin and Marie were so disappointed, but their mere presence was enough to create a cheerful atmosphere.
They also shared funny anecdotes about their lives. Marie, being more adventurous than Martin, had many more stories to tell:
"Well, you'll never guess the ending of this one! It's so unexpected that no one can imagine what's going to happen!"
"Oh, really?" "Well, test me, I've seen so many movies that nothing surprises me anymore."
"Yeah, yeah, we'll see. So, it all started, I think, about a month ago."
After that, no joke, an hour and a half of non-stop discussion. Marie finished her punchline with:
"And the whole time it was just her dog!"
Out of context, you could say the punchline is lame, but no, it was really the least plausible thing in the script, so Martin's shocking reply, by way of seven, was:
"NO, SERIOUSLY! HOW?!"
"And you see, that's the thing, NO ONE KNOWS OR CAN EXPLAIN IT!"
Immediately, Marie burst out laughing, slapping her leg and jerking around, but it was her famous laugh. That laugh, which made the restaurant glasses tremble, which was so powerful that you could hear it at the other end of the road, the seagulls thought someone was communicating with them. But the people looked at them sourly, chatting away while simultaneously casting judgmental glances at their director. The more she laughed, the more the audience's anger rose.
In the midst of the cacophony, she added:
"You, who've watched so many films! Well, sir, you didn't see that coming!"
The pressure was mounting, and Martin was starting to panic. His eyes darted everywhere, his body sweating profusely. He had transformed into a champagne bottle, the pressure inside building more and more, each air bubble pushing to escape, accumulating until suddenly the cork popped.
"Shhh! What are you doing?! You're embarrassing us!"
A silence fell instantly. People resumed their normal conversations, but Martin and Marie had both turned bright red. At the same time, they both stammered,
"Sorry... I-"
They sat facing each other, each looking either at the floor or in the opposite direction, unsure what to say. Marie's fear had materialized. Although she was usually aware that she was awkward and that people stared at her, she didn't care because nothing mattered to her and she had nothing to lose. But this time, she had him, and she absolutely didn't want to lose him, because she loved him, even though she couldn't really explain why. She felt this mad love for this strange man. And to avoid losing him, she told herself, so be it, she would sacrifice her excessive side. She adjusted her smile, looked him straight in the eyes with an innocent expression, and declared:
"Oh, oops, I might have gotten carried away a little, sorry Martin!"
"Uhhh... no, no, I didn't mean to, no, don't apologize, I'm the one who should apologize, I was really awful, uhh, sorry, sorry..."
"Oh no, don't apologize, I totally understand."
"But-"
"No! really, so where were we? Oh yeah, another hilarious thing that happened to me was with my neighbor Alex, yes, the same guy from the previous anecdote!"
At first, Martin was still a little embarrassed, but Marie's charm and confidence so eased the atmosphere that they were back to normal, chatting for hours.
That said, at the end of the anecdote, although it was yet another funny punchline, Marie laughed, but with a... normal laugh. Even though she looked like she was laughing her head off, something was wrong, and Martin noticed. Because of him, she no longer laughed naturally, and he was so ashamed of it.
At the end of the date, Martin was sure she hated him and that they would never see each other again. He looked so sad and guilty. Nevertheless, not even three hours after that disastrous date, Marie texted Martin, speaking normally as if nothing had happened. They chatted endlessly, mostly complaining about how the restaurant had no culinary appeal and how the two of them could open a hugely successful restaurant, especially for her "bacon, egg, and cheese" sandwich. At that point, Martin realized he was actually overreacting and that it might not be such a big deal. From that day on, Marie decided to conform and stop being eccentric, so as not to risk losing Martin. On their third date, she dressed normally, even ditching her pin. Her authentic self-had completely vanished, and Martin hated it. He hated seeing her like this. Even though she acted as if everything was normal, Martin sensed the change and, above all, felt immense shame. He felt as if he had erased the woman he once knew.
However, outside of dates, for once, Marie no longer felt judged by the world. She seemed appreciated, safe. No one judged her, insulted her, or made her feel like a monster. She loved this feeling and didn't want to lose it. Other women complimented her on her look, even though she was wearing the exact same clothes as them. She no longer felt self-conscious about looking around her when she walked. She felt calm and secure. The third date ended uneventfully. Martin realized his mistake and thought he was making Marie sad, but for Marie, she felt like she'd never been happier; she thought she was truly happy.
Martin was determined to bring back her genuine smile. So, on the fourth date, he first tried making jokes—some funny, some… like putting French fries up her nose… yeah, well, he's no natural comedian, but no matter the jokes, she still had that strange laugh… nothing worked. The Marie he'd known was gone. But no, he wasn't going to give up. So, without hesitation, he stood up, climbed onto the table, sandwich in hand, and started making monkey gestures and noises, then sat down immediately. He had turned as red as a tomato, but the adrenaline in his head made him feel almost drunk.
He looked Marie straight in the eyes, and they both burst out laughing. Now they both had that loud, duck-like laugh, and they were laughing so hard! "Finally," Martin thought, he had finally found Marie again.
But for her part, although she was laughing like a madwoman, she was trying so hard not to look over the table, but the pleasure and the need to know got the better of her. Seeing people staring at them, she was immediately ashamed, and like a bottle of champagne… "You've just embarrassed us! No, sorry, I can't!" She immediately ran out of the store and went home in tears.
She sobbed uncontrollably, not from shame at laughing, but from regret; she hadn't wanted to talk to him like that. She looked at herself in the mirror and barely recognized herself.
"Why am I like this? Why can't I live anymore?" “She was no longer happy now. Although she felt safe, her joy had vanished, and there was nothing she could do about it. She thought,
“It’s over. I’ll never truly smile again in my life. If I was capable of doing this to Martin, it means I’m no longer myself. Something inside me no longer wants me to be myself. I’ve become just like everyone else, without authenticity, without real joy. Now everything depends on others. No, I don’t want to live this life. No, no, no, no, no, why?” In her right hand, she held her cell phone, which displayed 102 missed calls from Martin, but her left hand moved toward the set of knives. She refused to live a miserable life. Her vision widened, her heart raced, the air became as heavy as water, and she sweated profusely. Her body was telling her no, but her hand continued to reach for the knife.” Knife in hand, ready to end it all, she regained her composure and cried out loudly,
"NO!" She decided to choose her own path in life. If she had managed to resist judgment all these years, why would now be any different? And then there was Martin. She would never make him feel such guilt; she would be ready to sacrifice herself to avoid causing him such pain.
So, she decided to go to Martin's house to apologize and show him that she was ready to change for him, for this love.
However, at that moment, she didn't know that when she went to his house, she would find his lifeless body on the floor, a pistol in one hand and a letter in the other that read:
Forgive me, Marie.
I never meant to erase your laughter.
The End