First time posting. Excuse any mistakes. I (M45) have a crush on a woman that works in the medical records department at one of my doctors offices. I don’t know her age only her name. I realize it’s a touchy situation because I met her and only see her occasionally at her place of work. Since she is at work she kind of has to be friendly to customers/patience. The whole working in the medical records department thing isn’t lost on me either. I would also hate to make her feel uncomfortable at her place of work by telling her how I feel/asking her if she’d like to get coffee.
I know she is at work and therefore obligated to be pleasant. But she is far more pleasant and friendly than any other employee at the clinic. She has such a bright and cheerful personality and comes of is very kind and empathetic. I don’t take her kindness as flirtatious I just really find it attractive myself. When she first started at the office she was one of the check-in people. I noticed her right away because she was new and very cute. It’s the only time she ever called me Mr. (Last name). Two weeks later when I went back she stood up and said “hi Mark!” in a very happy and cheerful way. She seemed to really like her new job. I don’t think that she remembered my name because I’m super attractive in anyway but was impressed that she remembered me. She had to ask my last name and birthdate to check me in so I know my name was t up on a screen. There are a lot of patients at this clinic and I like that she remembers and uses people’s first names. People like to hear their names. So, again it’s not that I think I she must like me because of remembering my name. I just really like that about her. At one point I thought she had left until my mother got diagnosed with a rare terminal brain infection called CJD. My mom was rapidly declining from the dementia the illness caused and we needed to get all the healthcare proxy stuff worked out. My mother was very apprehensive. When we were called back into the medical records/billing office it was the girl (I’ll call her M) from the front desk. I was so relieved because I knew she would make my mom feel better about the process and she did. She actually made us both feel better about the process. I would pass her in the hall way from time to time and she would always perk up and say Hi Mark in a very sweet and cheerful way. A few months later when my mother passed she was the one who helped me get a copy of my mother’s autopsy report so we could find out if the CJD she had was hereditary (it wasn’t!). I’m not head over heels for her but I could listen to her talk all day and every time I see her in the hallways she makes my day a little bit better. I’m. It really sure where to go from here. Should I just drop it because of possible HIPPA complications and the limited access I have to seeing her? I always say hello and try to match her enthusiasm. I tell her that is great to see her and complemented her new haircut the other day. I am limited to the interactions that last less than 30 seconds and don’t want to start overthinking the whole thing. I’m hoping this is interesting enough for people to read and be polite. I think the worse thing would be making her feel uncomfortable at work with an unwanted invite to coffee. I know someone will ask and I want the best responses possible so I will tell you it is a mental health clinic. I’m. It county ordered to go there or anything. I’ve been going there for about 10 years now and it’s the only close clinic that has a Spravato program which treats my treatment resistant depression. Is there a way to move forward? My therapist knows about how I feel and agrees the M is a uniquely kind cheerful person and everyone likes her. I don’t ask my therapist any questions about her because I already know that wouldn’t be inappropriate. And maybe I’m just afraid to hear she wouldn’t be allowed to get coffee with me even if she wanted to.
Thanks