Cabergoline is ruining my life
This is more of a vent than anything. Not really looking for advice.
I've been on Cabergoline for 3 years this time around. I tried bromocriptine, and I couldn't tolerate it. I was dizzy all the time, and even 3 months in, I was puking my guts out.
I was diagnosed with a prolactinoma in July 2009. I was on Cabergoline until 2011. I stopped taking it because I hated what it was doing to me, and nobody listened or believed me.
I went on it again in May 2023 because I was exhausted from having such elevated prolactin, and I was tired of not having energy and not being able to do anything. I felt like I was constantly in a fog.
Ever since restarting it, while the problems related to elevated prolactin have went away, I'm struggling with impulse control, strong sexual urges, and I'm terrified it's going to lead me to a divorce.
I spend money more freely. Like I don't even stop to think of the consequences of it. I gambled away $4,000 in the span of 30 minutes at a slot machine, and the only reason I didn't spend more was because I maxed out my debit card and didn't have anything left to spend. I've started watching porn, and it's ruining my view of sex, and I struggle to go a day without using porn to help pleasure myself. I nearly sexted someone before I pulled myself out of it because the last thing I want to do is cheat on my spouse.
I'm so irritable and angry now. Things that never bothered me set me off. I feel like a different person, and I don't even recognize myself anymore. My depression is at an all time low, and I'm terrified because of how impulsive I am.
I go back to the endocrinologist in August, and there's no earlier appointments available. I've called many times hoping someone canceled, and have my name on the list in case someone does cancel.
But I'm also at a loss and don't know what to do. When I don't take Cabergoline, my prolactin rises relatively quickly. I don't want to go back to bromocriptine because even taking it at night didn't help with the vomiting. I don't really want to have surgery because I'm terrified of surgery especially something so close to my brain. And I don't really want to not treat the prolactinoma because I felt awful without it.
I'm just not sure what to do anymore.