u/Connect_Principle

Hi everyone, I want to share the story of a habit that took over my life for a long time.
It all started when I was 11. I began smoking with a friend, but after a year, I lost interest and got into gaming, so the cigarettes went away. Two years later, however, my parents pushed me away from the computer, and I fell right back into it. My best friend and neighbor was a bit of a rebel, and whenever we went out, he was smoking and getting into trouble. I just followed suit.
At first, it was just occasional. But as I got older, it escalated to half a pack a day by the time I was 16. Smoking started getting expensive, so I switched to vaping. That lasted about three years until I was 19, which is when I discovered Velo (nicotine pouches). That was the real turning point—and not a good one. I was using them constantly. Then Covid hit, I was gaming a lot, and I was going through a can of "Blue Velo" (10.9mg per pouch) a day. Those pouches were practically my daily calorie intake because I’d use them instead of eating.
After about a year, I made my first attempt to quit because I felt physically sick. My routine was: wake up, pop a pouch instead of breakfast, and keep going until I felt nauseous. Then I’d wait a bit and do it all over again until my stomach hurt. Not to mention the constant fatigue—my entire existence depended on Velo and a state of constant overdose.
Over the next three years, I tried to quit about ten times. Every attempt failed within a month at most. I always relied on Defumoxan; I couldn't imagine quitting without it. During university, my anxiety was through the roof, and I was terrified that if I quit, I wouldn't be able to focus on my studies. I managed to finish my Bachelor’s and then quit for four months. But then my parents pressured me into a Master’s program. Facing an exam I couldn't study for, I thought: "I’ll just have one Velo, like I did during my Bachelor's, and I'll get through it."
As I later realized, the struggle wasn't caused by nicotine withdrawal; it was simply that I didn't want to be in school and I was bored.
After that fiasco, it was a cycle of one week on, one week off. Then I picked up Allen Carr’s book. It hooked me immediately, especially where he describes feeling like his entire purpose in life was just to find the answer to how to stop. I felt exactly the same. Our mental processes were identical; the addiction had brought us to the same dark place. (Though Allen didn't quit until he was 70, and I’m only 24).
I really connect with his philosophy: don't use substitutes, keep a positive mindset, and don't "reward" yourself for quitting or make bets with others. These were things I hadn't realized on my own. I also learned that quitting isn't some grand miracle—you simply become a non-smoker, and everything else is just psychological.
Thanks to this book, I realized how much of my life was spent in constant anxiety and fear because my existence was tied to nicotine. I even suffered from occasional depersonalization, which stopped after I read the book (perhaps because Carr helped me stop being so afraid). I finally understood that a non-smoker doesn't feel "different" than a smoker; they have the same feelings, but a smoker’s only response to any stimulus is: "I need nicotine, then I'll figure out what to do."
After finishing the book, I actually started enjoying reading. I realized my nicotine addiction was fueled by my underlying anxiety. My mom’s side of the family is very prone to anxiety, but no one ever addressed it. That led me to my next book: "Unwinding Anxiety" by Judson Brewer. I haven't finished it yet, but I highly recommend it to anyone who struggles with worry or has a similar anxious personality.
To everyone out there who struggles with anxiety and is still caught in the nicotine trap like I was: please consider these books. They can truly change your life. :)
I am currently 8 days into my life as a non-smoker, and for the first time, I know I’m staying this way for good.