I recently transferred from Christianity to Hellenic worship, and I have had this dreadful feeling every time I think about the transition. The Christian God has helped me a lot and I grew close, and i felt happy, but my values were not lined with the Christian values. I was drawn to nature and Paganism, and through exploring I found Hellenic worship. I have had a love for Greek Mythology since I was young and it felt right so I looked into it. I first went to Lady Nyx to worship as I have always felt a deep connection with her, but later on I moved to others, and I eventually ended up worshipping Lady Hekate the most. I feel bad. I still honor the others of course, but I'm closer to Lady Hekate than most other Gods. Is that bad that I am closer to Lady Hekate then devoting my time to Lady Nyx instead? She has helped me before, but during a hard time Lady Hekate was the one i reached out towards, and this guilt has been hiding behind my thoughts every time I pray.
While I go to sleep, the things Christians and Catholics post on Pagan videos rotate through my head like "God/Jesus forgives you, you will go to hell" etc. I have had several breakdowns where I feel like I betrayed the Christian God and that I will crawl back on hands and knees begging for forgiveness once I die. I feel the Greek Gods, but I have this doubt whispering to me every time I think, and it has like ruined me basically. It mostly goes back to when I was young and asked the Chistian God if the other Gods like Egyptian etc were real. I felt a no, it was one God. I was fine with that until I grew older and just couldn't believe that there is a single God in the whole universe. That shortly led to my switch. I feel like I have severely sinned and that something is wrong with me.
Does anyone else feel this way? is this normal?
(Also, I am not saying Christianity or Catholic practices are bad, I'm just struggling with the things I have been taught when younger. I still fully respect all religions)