u/Confident-Champion13

Trying to meditate to heal my stomach and generally, decrease anxiety. I have bad anxiety disorder. I also want to change a lot of aspects of my life, but everything little by little. I haven’t meditated in a long time because, I can get into a very deep state where I feel like I am literally in my brain and my body feels incredibly heavy, and because I am obsessed with having control over my body, I freak out.
The second thing that stops me, is the fear of not imagining something bad about the people I love and hurting them because I could attract that event or situation.
So hard to live with OCD, but meditation is so calming I want and need to do it to regulate my nervous system. However, if imagining something I don’t want could influence the life of someone I love, I would rather not heal myself. How can I overcome this?

This flare started 2 weeks ago. My gastritis started almost 2 years ago. I’ve been taking Omeprazole 20 mg every day during this time until suddenly wasn’t helping anymore. Went to see a doctor, started taking 40 mg of Omeprazole again, did that for 9 days. I don’t see much improvement, I only eat boiled rice, and even that hurts both my stomach and esophagus.

My stomach burns so badly when I wake up and my esophagus every time I eat or after the meals. I eat small portions, I have a lot of belching as well. Now I developed a new pain under my right ribs, some burning in there, checked my gallbladder and that’s fine so I suspect duodenitis. I also have to go to the bathroom when I eat or right after.

Went to a new doctor today, prescribed

1. 20 mg Esomeprazole in the morning, 20 mg at night
2. a substance similar to the one in Gaviscone, alginate I think
3. a homeopathic one from Boiron that has sugar, I tried it and gave my burning on the esophagus
4. Buscopan (Scopolamine butylbromide)

He is a very good doctor and I do trust him, but my pains are so intense that I’m scared the Esomeprasole won’t be as strong as Omeprazole in the first part of the day. But then again, the Omeprazole doesn’t seem to do much this time.

I’m scared about this pain in the stomac and esophagus, but also about this new one that I have under my ribs. It started with a burning in the right side of my stomach. So maybe a new ulceration or something?

The doctor said if I do an endoscopy while I have so much inflammation won’t be good for me.

Did anyone go through something similar? Does anything helped you? Did you get rid of this duodenitis?