Cant revise and got no clue what to do.
Hi guys,
this post feels so stupid because i know literally 95% of a level people are locked the hell in and are working so hard but for some reason i cant seem to manage it. For the past 6 months or more, i have felt like im drowning in work. I barely scraped a good ucat but im so grateful for it. I have ALWAYS been so hardworking and got 8-9’s in my GCSEs and got predicted A*AAA in year 12 despite some challenges i was facing.
This year, the most important year, i feel like ive blown it. Staying in bed all day, having everyone surrounding me wondering what the hells happening, giving me motivation, yelling at me, and having constant, long emails sent from school regarding me. I have no one to blame but me but when i go to revise i cannot focus for more than 5 minutes, and just start panicking like crazy about my workload (let me tell you, its a lot 😅) and how im not going to get into uni at this rate. Everything about me has gone downhill this year, i try to fix it, i fail and its a cycle im stuck in. Ive just become so unlike myself, or more like myself, all my bad qualities maxxed out, and most importantly, im just SICK of revising.
I am horrified at the thought of resitting ( most if not all unis require the lowest minimum BBB in first sitting or u cant apply + many unis require a levels to only take 2 yrs max), redoing my ucat as idk if ill scrape it this time, and on top of this my parents wont allow a gap year and claim they will force me into a different career if i dont make it 🙃
I know the only way out of this is literally to lock in but the most hours i can do is like 2 in a day. I feel ashamed when i look at my clock, even in my gcse prime i was burning 5-6 from february, and i know 2 is better than 0 but i also know it wont cut it and take me to A’s. IM JUST SO FRUSTRATED. WHY CANT I REVISE? why have i become so lazy? is this a victim complex ive fallen in right now because its literally just my fault for not revising? 😓
Any response would be nice. I know this is on me, and i dont expect anyone to have answers or reasons for my downfall and i dont know what comments to expect either but thank you for reading this, it was kind of my last hope🙂