I’ve been carrying something on my mind for a while and I know it’s a complicated situation. I’ve developed strong feelings for someone who is over 20 years older than me. I’ve known him for a couple of years and over time, he’s had a significant emotional impact on me.
We’ve spent time together, travelled and I genuinely feel a deep connection with him. In many ways, he feels like everything I’ve ever wanted in a partner. He’s intelligent, engaging, fun, shares my love for travel, music, art, guides me and much more.
However, the reality is that he has an established life.A family, children and responsibilities and as to me - I am still in my "building my life" era where I believe I am successfully climbing the career ladder at a good pace, making money, enjoying my single life, travelling and trying new things in life. I know where he stands and I would never want to come in between that. I’ve accepted that we can’t be together, but it still hurts knowing that the timing wasn’t in our favor. It feels like we met at two very different stages of life and under different circumstances, things could have been very different.
Now, I don’t want judgment. I’m really aware of the situation and its boundaries. Yes i am weirdly still in two minds where i want to distance off a bit but i also want him to be a part of my life. It really hurts me that we are in two different stages of life. I really am fond of him.
What I’m really struggling with is how to move on from something that felt so real and meaningful, even though it wasn’t meant to be. What do i really do?