am I annoying or are we just becoming different people
I 17f am a junior in high school. This post is about my friends, but it's not necessarily a friend group, but we all know and are friendly with each other
I tend to overshare things I've experienced and my goals, and I have the urge to tell other people. But I feel like whenever I share stuff, I can tell that I'm the only one saying a lot and don't get the same wavelength of conversation back. I feel like it's been like this since high school started. I used to have friends I could text anything to, like an event that just happened or someone to celebrate with, but that ended after freshman year. No biggie, I understand that friend groups change, and you meet new people. I'm an only child, and I live far away from my school, so I don't have any neighbors who go to my school or anybody I can walk home with.
I'm usually the one initiating plans (that often don't happen) or texting first. So last week at lunch, I decided I wouldn't say anything and see if they initiated contact. I just ate my lunch and was on my phone. No one said anything to me until I initiated my first sentence to ask for some candy, which was like 20-30 minutes into lunch. I tried again today and not saying anything, but the same thing happened. It confuses me because this one friend (who id say im closest with) does a lot for me, cause I have a club and she made a ton of crochet stuff, and I also parked at her house for like 2 weeks cause my parents were out of town and she drove me to school too.
I will concede I can be annoying, but who would ever say that to someone's face? We go to a competitive high school, so I started taking junior year really seriously this year and I will admit I got a little pretentious when talking about stats and ecs an stuff. I'm also looking back and I can be a little controlling(?) Me and the friend I mentioned above were doing a presentation project and I had an idea of what to do because I chose the topic and I assumed I would be doing it alone since she was absent the day it was assigned, so I kept making adjustments I thought would make logical sense and I explained it and asked for feedback and stuff, but it felt like she was kinda passive aggressive in a way that she believed I was self-serving or stuff like that
I also have a habit of being judgey. In my head, I act normally, but I once had someone say, "no need to have an attitude." I had smth I was confused about, and I said like "ok..." in a pondering way (it was pondering to me, but not to them), and it really hit me. I also have RBF and a naturally angry-looking face, so it doesn't really help.
Anyway, Ive known most of my friends since middle and elementary school. Are we just becoming different people? Should I stick this friendship out until end of senior year? I can answer some questions to diagnose if I'm annoying (lol)!