paranoid about failing practicum
UBC BeD program (11month), in long practicum, week7 of teaching grade 6, currently teaching full time.
Anxious and worrying for a few reasons (and I want to preface this by saying that I'm fully aware that I've only been teaching 7 weeks!! I have TONS of learning and growing to do and I'm always very receptive to feedback. yes... even from reddit i guess haha)
- I'm on my second interim report (an interim basically means "fix these things within 2 weeks for we kick you out of teacher school. when i passed my first interim i was immediately placed into a second one. currently my interim is about classroom management and content accuracy. I've rectified content accuracy by relying on old textbooks to fact-check myself, so far no more slip-ups! with classroom management... it's a work in progress. i was told by my sponsor teacher that this group is "one of the most difficult to management in his 12 years of teaching" so im trying not to fully blame myself. but it's been very uphill and upsetting.) I was told today over email that because of my 2 interim reports that "im no longer in good standing". deeply worrying.
- at my midpoint meeting (week 5, we do 10 weeks practicum total. this is basically a meeting where I was approved to take on the full teaching load. i was approved!) I was told I was behind other teacher candidates (theres a checklist where i need to meet all the expectations, I didn't "fail" any items but i had a lot of "approaching expectation" instead of "meeting expectation") and that I needed to "work harder than i ever have in my entire life"
- I took 2 days off sick due to the flu (i came in sick to teach the few days leading up to it because theres a "no days off" type culture around practicum) and was basically intimidated the whole time i was away (mostly via text by my sponsor teacher. even tho i prepared TOC style folders for all my days away, AND i had a doctors note justifying my brief time away, AND everybody knew I was sick due to my visible illness)
alright guys... let me know what you think. I'm truly so paranoid about failing practicum and i appreciate any and all honest answers. I'm really worn thin and looking for guidance.