For the first time I feel like I had some success!
I have had pretty severe emetophobia for about 25 years. I accomplished my life goal of having two children, but sometimes it comes with challenges.
In the past I haven’t been able to handle when my son has gotten sick. My husband has had to be the one to sit up with him all night and care for him which makes me feel like a terrible mom. I constantly fear that something is wrong and that he is going to v*.
This past weekend at bedtime he told us his tummy hurt. I immediately went into panic. My husband had to stay up all night with him (I wasn’t successful at this.. small steps!). He ended up v* a couple times hours later. I didn’t see it but my husband told me. Around 5 am he started crying for me. I was able to be brave and be with him the rest of the day until he was feeling better. I even let him sit on my lap which has been a huge struggle in the past for me.
I think I would have had a much harder time if he was actively v* or I saw him v*, but I still feel like it was a success that I was able to handle the anxiety of him potentially v*! I also did not let my OCD kick into overdrive and isolate him from my infant daughter for days like I have in the past.
Very small step to success but I feel like I handled it a little better this time than I have past illnesses! I would love to be “normal” and not fear my kids getting sick and would definitely love to be able to care for them better when they are sick.