u/Christa_Marie94

✨️Added after seeing people downvote my comments and upvote an insane one✨️ I'm not telling anyone how to feel, I'm telling you some shit you should do if you want to live with this without wanting to off yourself every single day. Chill out isn't telling you how to feel- it's telling you what to do. Feel mad, feel sad, get furious- why do I give a fuck? But I do give a fuck if young people are feeling the need to kill themselves after being diagnosed with something I know at least vast majority saying this can deal with, live with, and eventually thrive with. I'm not going to sugar coat anything, especially for a stranger reacting to my post in the most disingenuous way possible, so if you don't like how I responded to them, I don't know what to tell you, not everyone is sugarplums and fairytales and some people just speak fucking directly. As someone with crohn's disease though, you should probably get used to people speaking to you directly because most GI doctors and especially anesthesiologists will as well. But just because I'm direct, confrontational, and not afraid to call out when someone says something fucking stupid, doesn't mean I don't care about you all suffering with this same shit as me and that's why I posted this, so you can learn from someone who has been through it all, some of the worst shit life can throw at you, and I know I'm going to continue to go through that, but going through it is better than the alternative and even strangers on reddit genuinely don't want you to kill yourself.

✨️Second add on✨️ and my dms are ALWAYS open to anyone on here needing to talk, looking for advice, or just looking for someone to commiserate with. I may be direct and considered a "bitch" but I'm pretty fucking wise, incredibly empathetic, care about people deeply as a whole and you would be hard pressed to find a traumatic situation in life besides like living in an actively war torn country that I haven't experienced, so if you're ever struggling, I'm here and I'm up late and I will always have time to answer you.

I see so many posts every day where someone is newly diagnosed and their entire world is crashing down around them. TLDR: chill out, you're going to get through this, the human brain has evolved more for disappointment than happiness, you'll adjust.

Especially to the younger people out there, it's fucking rough, but I promise you'll get through it and you'll get more used to it. You'll never fully get used to it- take the proper steps to mourn the life you'd thought you would have before this diagnosis and then start to plan the realistic life that is ahead of you. It will be filled with pain and disappointment and more pain (but the secret is, most people's lives are, no matter what). Some friends won't stick through it, whether it be because you can't hang out as much anymore or because of your mental health- they weren't your friends to begin with. If you're prone to anxiety and depression, do some reading up on health-related C-PTSD because this disease can and most likely will put you through some traumatic medical procedures and side effects. You'll think you won't find a romantic partner because of the gross side effects of this disease- there are PLENTY of people out there who won't give a fuck what the side effects are and will take care of you and love you through it, but also know there are plenty of assholes out there who will also use this disease to try to make fun of you- make them feel like the asshole they are for that. Find the things in life that bring you joy that this disease can't take away from you and hold them as close as possible when the disease takes what it can from you, and it will take a lot. This disease will break you down; it makes you as vulnerable as you can be, as weak as you can be, and as fed up as you can be and fight through it and you will come out stronger, more confident, and more empathetic and it is worth it. I've experienced everything this disease has to offer nearly except an ostomy bag; I've been in and out of psych wards for trying to kms more times than I can count between 14 and 26; I hated my life so much I was a junkie for nearly a decade; there are days where I still want to end my life, days where I still mourn the life I thought I would have (diagnosed at 7, retrospectively doctors think I was born with it, I'll be 32 this august). This life won't be easy, but I promise it's worth it. I truly think the point of life is to experience life so experience it- this is the one you were given, figure out why and what you're supposed to do with it, but I promise on everything the answer isn't give up and end it. Oh! And last word of advice for the newbies, BE FUCKING HONEST WITH YOUR DOCTORS, NO MATTER HOW EMBARASSING (and get real used to being naked in front of a bunch of people, especially if your hospital is affiliated with a local medical school, and super used to things going up your asshole because that's going to be a regular thing now, so take a deep breath and relax, 98% of the time, unless something is REALLY wrong, what they're going to put up there won't hurt; even with Crohn's, you've pushed out poos bigger than whatever they're putting up, so it'll just be uncomfortable. Like I said at the top, the brain is built to adapt, and especially built to adapt to bad situations. You will adapt. You will survive. You'll learn to find the good in this. And just scroll through the sub, you're far from being alone. 💖