u/Cheonrolo

I'm wondering if it's possible to be in healthcare alongside social anxiety/depression. I feel frustrated because it makes me so inconsistent; some days my head is clear and I work with ease but a lot of the time I feel my judgement is clouded and don't quite feel "right", and even sitting in the communal break room is fucking overwhelming.

I think it would be extremely hard to seek help from fellow RTs as a new grad with these mental health issues and struggling already with imposter syndrome and feeling like I look dumb (people are way more understanding on an online forum than in person sometimes). Granted, I wouldn't be where I am in this program if I didn't have SOMETHING going for me. I love this profession and I know I'm gonna make it work... but I guess I'm just ruminating more than I should. I guess I am just feeling self limited. Any tips/advice?

It's gotten to the point where I'll be generating fake emotions and giving input on shit I don't even care about in conversations at work/school and all I can think of is "they're laughing and looking at me each time they give their input, good job me for keeping up the mask and looking conversationabke". This will be an issue because I am going to work in a field where I really need to be talking to people but I just don't care. About anything. And this will be a hindrance to my future job too, which I cannot afford to mess up.