how do i balance empathy and not being gullible or easily manipulated?
i (27f) have been working at a nonprofit for about a year and am really struggling with how to mentally frame the relationships i have with my clients. for context, the nonprofit offers vocational development services for people who have experienced homelessness and incarceration and the vast majority have severe substance abuse issues. i am not a licensed therapist or social worker, but i often find myself providing emotional support and dealing with heavy trauma. many of my clients also work for my organization as part of a contract sanitation crew in my city. i feel stuck between being a straight up vocational counselor who is technically their employer and a "therapist"/confidante for my clients.
it seems like people at my work fall into two categories: either they're naive and flowery and don't have any boundaries with clients, or they are very harsh against our clients and complain about their unreliability (many clients are clearly still using, don't have stable housing, and/or have other serious issues in their personal lives that get in the way of them doing their jobs). i really do not want to fall into the trap of thinking negatively of my clients or being overly suspicious of them, because i know so many of them have never had any type of real emotional intimacy and are treated in all areas of their lives like they are criminals. however, i also don't want to be an idiot and always assume best intentions and allow myself to be taken advantage of or lied to.
i was definitely not trained enough for this role and while i find the job itself pretty rewarding, there are serious issues with the way the organization is run and i don't plan to stay long-term. i am not looking for large scale solutions to change the organization, but i would love input from people who work with this type of population on how to have a sense of healthy skepticism while still holding softness and empathy. thank you all so much! i have so much admiration for the work you do.