u/CautiousAttorney6181

​

I did not approach God gently

there was no softness left in me

to disguise the question

I stood in front of myself—

undeniable, unedited

and said it plainly

what is this

because it is no longer confusion

it is recurrence

I recognize the sequence

before it unfolds

the tone

the timing

the precise moment

attention begins to imitate intention

and still

I remain

so this is not heartbreak

this is participation

this is informed consent

to my own disappointment

and I am exhausted

by my ability

to articulate the pattern

while still choosing

to inhabit it

I did not ask to be loved differently

I asked

to stop responding

to what I already understand

From my poetry collection- Museum Of The Girl I Used to Be