Not strong enough for this type of pain. Will this hell ever end.
Was diagnosed 6 months ago after my elbow was locked for a year and couldn't straighten it anymore. Then came the knees and toes and fingers. I could somehow always work around the pain but hips is on a totally different scale. The pain is so bad I cannot eat much due to the pain or walk anymore without dibilating pain and hips locking. Had to quit my job as I could no longer attend the office.
I've been on MTX and Sulfasalazine for 4 months and getting worse. Had steroid shots and still nothing. I've lost close to 35lbs in 6 months. Used to be a big guy into the gym and now can't dress myself and looking at possible wheelchairs now, I can't put on socks or trouser, i feel my life is done and some days not worth living. Had dreams of starting a family one day.
I've just turrned 35, Doctor won't see me for another 3 weeks and has prescribed me the same drugs. Will this nightmare ever end? I drink alcohol daily for my mental health which isn't good but at least can escape this hell for a few hours a day, I'm not that bothered anymore about MTX and booze mix, would rather risk some relief. The only relief I had was from prednisolone on very high doses 25mg + but my blood pressure got so high they nearly sent me to ER, it seems one thing works but has 2x negative effects. It makes sense life expectancy is so low if the disease isn't in control. I read 26 years on average after diagnosis, I'd feel lucky to see another 5 years in this state.
I'm not really religious but sometimes think I'm being punished for something, it's strange. Sorry for the rant, I guess I am hoping there are anomilies out there who have somehow made it out or made a somewhat normal life from this horrific disease. If you are in remission take life with both hands and make the most of it.