Stressed about RSVPing no to a friends wedding that is 2 months prior to mine.
I am getting married in my home country this year. I have a friend, who’s also from my home country, also getting married in said country, 2 months before mine. She is a newer friend of mine but has quickly become a good friend. She was engaged before me but planned her wedding and finalized her date after me.
Since our weddings are so close and far away (long plane ride), I assumed we would both likely have to skip each others weddings due to distance/PTO/time/cost etc. I have no expectations of her attending my wedding due to that.
However when she finalized her date the first thing she asked me is if I thought I would be able to come. I said I’d have to see as it got closer due to PTO/money etc, soft indicating a no. I have since heard from other friends that she is planning to come to my wedding even if I don’t go to hers which also makes me a little uncomfy/sad to realize she would prioritize me even if I don’t prioritize her :(
Also, we are both invited and going to both mutual friends + non mutual friends weddings that are in the country we live in right now and close to our wedding dates. So it’s not like I’m not going to any weddings this year. But the weddings I am going to are much closer in distance and of friends I’ve known for much longer.
Is it best to do this in person or over text? Any advice on RSVPing no in a way that doesn’t harm our friendship? I don’t want to hurt her feelings or make her feel like she isn’t a priority. Since she’s a newer friend I’m not really sure how she’ll react.