Hi all — long-time lurker, first-time poster.
My 13-month-old falls asleep independently at bedtime but hasn't been nap trained yet. Her wake windows are approximately 3–3.5 / 3.5–3.75 / 4.5–4.75; she doesn't seem ready to drop to one nap.
The issue is that we want to do two things: drop her night feeds (still eating twice a night!) and move her to her own room. The room move involves some musical chairs — she'd move into her older brother's room, he'd move into our home office, and the home office would move into our bedroom.
I've been tapering her night feeds, but illness and teething keep forcing me to pause. Sometimes I can get her back to sleep without feeding, either with in-crib soothing or by walking her back and forth — a sleep association I frustratingly have to fall back on when she's loudly refusing in-crib soothing. She usually rejects attempts by her dad to settle her at night.
Our house is small. We're comfortable letting her fuss for a few minutes before responding, but we're not comfortable with full screaming (which is her standard mode during night wakes) because it risks waking her older brother. That has made us inconsistent with night wakes, which obviously isn't helping.
Her brother dropped night feeds easily and had no siblings in the picture when we moved him to his own room, so we're having a different experience the second time around. We're too tired to think through the right sequencing clearly.
For those who've navigated this: did you wean first or move first? And how did you manage sibling disruption during the process?
Thanks in advance!