I’ve played football my entire life. I started when I was 7, and it’s been 13 years now. I played in high school and eventually had the opportunity to move states and get a scholarship to help pay for college. But the reality is, I lost my love for the game a long time ago—I only accepted the scholarship so I could get a high-quality education.
In high school, I was a great athlete, but I’ve never been a big guy—actually below average in height and weight for Division I football. Now that I’m surrounded by players with equal or better talent, I feel like I’m nothing special. In another situation, that might push me to improve, but honestly, I just don’t care about this lifestyle anymore.
I feel like I’m constantly under a microscope, where every mistake is noticed and documented. I feel pressured by coaches and even other players, and it’s starting to affect my grades in a serious way. The worst part is that I feel like I can’t quit, because my life now revolves around my ability to perform on the field.
I guess what I’m trying to say is that I hate this, and I feel completely alone in this journey. I don’t want to disappoint my parents, but I also don’t know how much longer I can keep going like this. I just want to know if there’s anyone out there who’s gone through something similar, or if anyone has advice.
Thanks.