Not sure if this post is allowed.
My son will be 5 in a few weeks and he is on the spectrum (on the wait list for an official diagnosis). He has always had sensory overload and we have worked really, really hard to help him overcome these issues so we don't have full blown meltdowns anymore.
The biggest issue we are facing now is hair washing. He's always hated it. But after literal YEARS of working with him, he lets us wash his hair. It's a little fussing. A little crying. Asking for a towel. And then that's it. No hitting, no blood curdling screams, no trying to escape the tub.
And then he makes a new friend at school. Who also dislikes having his hair washed. (We know because we've had play dates and apparently the boys have talked about it at school lol) And now we are back to square one. Hitting and pushing and screaming so loud my ears hurt. I put him to bed and just sobbed because what happened? It's been weeks now and every day is worse.
My husband wants to wash his hair every day to get him used to it again but I don't know if I have the strength, emotionally or mentally. I've tried taking things away, I've tried offering incentives but those don't work.