u/BirthdayGeneral6423

Our 16 week old will not sleep. I have no idea how he is still running and what fuel it is on because he will not nap for longer than 10-15 minutes, unless I’m laying with him then I can squeak 30 minutes out of him.

He is rolling so we can’t swaddle him, but we’ve tried everything else- aside from spending money we don’t have on random “must-have’s” that may or may not work. It takes forever to get him to fall asleep but when we finally get him to sleep, he wakes up immediately upon transfer. We’ve held him until he’s in deep sleep before transferring; he jolts awake immediately smiling and giggling. We’ve tried transferring him drowsy; smiles and giggles. We’ve tried bed sharing (something we swore we wouldn’t do, but we cannot sleep!!), and he wakes up every 30 minutes needing to be soothed back to sleep but if you don’t catch him in time- you guessed it; smiles and giggles. It would be super cute if we weren’t absolutely exhausted. It’s so frustrating.

It’s even more frustrating when he fought naps and bedtime so hard all day, that by the time we are completely gassed and worn out from trying to get him to sleep, he’s now overtired and screaming his head off like someone’s trying to murder him. It’s so overwhelming and we feel like we’re trying everything.

I am a stay-at-home mom and solo parent for 13 hours a day. Our son is nearly 20 pounds and I cannot hold him for his entire nap. My back, neck, and shoulders are constantly throbbing and tight from trying to contact nap with him. He will not nap on my chest because I think my breasts are too big and it’s an uncomfortable position for him. I need to sleep and so does his dad. We can’t hold him all night. What can we do?

I’m a ftm to a baby boy who is 3 months old, and such a smart and sweet baby. I’m absolutely obsessed with him and love him so much but I feel like I am not cut out to be his mother.

I’m a stay-at-home mom, a decision my and fiancé and I came to when I got pregnant. I have terrible anxiety that makes going to school, parenting, and working very difficult for me. We agreed I’d focus on completing my degree and raising our son while he would work and provide for us. He went on unpaid leave for 3 weeks after our baby was born and then had to return to work.

The reason I think I am not a good mother is because I feel so overwhelmed when I’m alone with our son throughout the week. My fiancé leaves for work around 5:30am and doesn’t get back until 6pm Mon-Thur, Fridays he gets home around 4. I dread being alone with my baby on the during the week, even though his dad does most of the childcare on weekends. His dad literally cares for him from the moment he gets home to the moment he leaves, he is so hands on and amazing with him. I’m still constantly overwhelmed and resentful though.

Our son has very bad reflux that we’ve tried almost everything for, so he needs to be held upright basically 24/7 and feeding him is chaotic. He spits up and screams, and it feels impossible to get him to nap more than 30 minutes. It’s a pain to do tummy time or anything but hold him. I’m afraid he’s missing out on valuable learning time because I can’t manage him well on my own.

I’m also exclusively pumping because baby boy formed a very strong bottle preference about 3 weeks after he was born. Finding time to pump, take care of myself, and hold him constantly makes me feel like I’m trapped and isolated from the world. I don’t have time to do anything I used to like to do during the day and I feel like I have no identity except for being our son’s mother.

Other SAHMs, single moms, and women that have much less helpful partners than I do seem to be managing far better than I can and coping so much better too. I feel like a failure for constantly being overwhelmed and losing my patience with my baby. I hate asking my family to watch him for a day because I hate being away from but can’t stand being alone with him. Asking for help feels like admitting I can’t do it when so many other mothers can.

Our son is so smiley and social, and he is very smart and so cute. He’s not a bad baby. I think I’m just a bad mom. Is there anyone that can reassure me that this is supposed to be this hard? Are other ftm just better at looking like they have their shit together? I feel like I should’ve never become a mom if I can’t manage on my own.