how do you overcome the neurosis of being single your whole life?
I'm sure we've all heard those platitudes that the chronically single get about how "relationships aren't everything!" or "true happiness comes from self-love!" or whatever but you'd have to be seriously naive to doubt how heavy it weighs on one's psyche and self-worth that comes with never having been in a relationship. No matter how you slice it, going through life and not experiencing a core developmental milestone the vast majority of people experience really does suck, and knowing that if it were to happen you'd be decades behind your peers in terms of experience sucks even more.
The worst part of being chronically single, though, is how badly it ruins your confidence to actually try and remedy the situation. I've thought about starting small by trying to go on a few tinder dates or maybe trying to at least get a talking stage or a situationship, but my insecurity always prevents me from going through with making an account. I don't think it's a fear of rejection that prevents me from trying, I've been rejected before and I got over it fairly quickly, I think what I'm actually afraid of is not being rejected. Being in a relationship is uncharted territory that I have no idea how to navigate, and the idea of a woman wanting to be my girlfriend and being in a relationship scares me more than being rejected. I think what I'm afraid of is being my genuine self around another person and having another person who's consistently in my life and whose needs I would have to consider and make time for. I guess I am definitely avoidant but not in a hedonistic "I want to sleep around and not commit" sort of way that the term sometimes denotes but in a "I am very afraid sharing my life with another human being" sort of way.
tbh I know that deep down I just need to stop being stubborn, get on the apps, and probably go to therapy but how the hell do you transition from being single your whole life to creating an active dating life in your late 20s?