Am I wrong for feeling this way? Please advise me
Assalamualaikum everyone. I’m a 22-year-old Muslim sister from Africa who wears hijab, and this is probably one of the most vulnerable things I’ve ever written online.
For a very long time now, I’ve been keeping these feelings to myself because I was scared of being judged, misunderstood, or looked at differently. I kept telling myself maybe it was just a phase or something I should ignore, but the truth is these feelings have stayed with me for years.
Over time, I started realizing that I’m genuinely attracted to white men. It’s not something I can easily explain, and honestly sometimes I struggle to even put it into words without feeling nervous. I just know that whenever I see interracial couples I feel something deep inside me. Sometimes it makes me happy, sometimes emotional, and sometimes confused because I don’t really know who I can talk to about it openly.
What makes this harder is that I come from an environment where I feel like people might judge me if they knew. So I stayed silent for a long time and carried these thoughts privately. But hiding it has honestly started to feel lonely.
Sometimes I also wonder if there are white men out there who are genuinely attracted to Black women but are also afraid of judgment, rejection, cultural differences, or not knowing how to approach it respectfully. I feel like maybe both sides sometimes stay silent because of fear.
I’m writing this because I’m tired of pretending these feelings don’t exist. I just want to understand myself better and hear from people who have experienced something similar in a real and respectful way.
Am I wrong to feel this way? Is it a bad thing? Please advise a sister. How did you deal with these feelings? Did you ever feel scared of being judged? Did you ever feel confused, lonely, or misunderstood because of your attraction?
Please be kind in the comments. This took a lot for me to say openly.